The Adult Spanking and Discipline Handbook
Last month, I received a message from author Gemma Forbes, with a polite request to read and review her new book, The Adult Spanking and Discipline Handbook: A Comprehensive Guide to Corporal Punishment. I’d already heard about this book from John Smith (of Kink and the City), and the title intrigued me. So I replied yes, I would be pleased to do so.
The prologue begins with “Governess Gemma Forbes is one of the best known spankers you’ve probably never heard of.” And I confess, I had not heard of her. But I liked her from the first chapter on. A retired pro domme with many years in the scene, Ms. Forbes had much to share, and she did so in a detailed and witty manner.
Establishing from the start that the book is purely about spanking and does not cover other forms of BDSM, Ms. Forbes also clarifies two other points: 1) She is not a switch and bottoming is not to her liking, and 2) while she acknowledges that many enjoy sex with their spankings, that aspect of TTWD will not be delved into here. The purpose of this book is to provide a comprehensive primer on the ABCs of spanking.
The ASDH goes on to discuss all things spanko, including definitions of orientations, discussions of implements and techniques, scenarios, role-playing vs. pure sensation play, and much more. A common thread running through all the chapters is that of safety, communication and trust. For the newbie (and for us old-bies too), these things cannot be emphasized enough. She also covers the topic many shy away from — how things can go wrong, and how to handle it if they do.
I really enjoyed Ms. Forbes’ writing style. For one thing, even though she is a top, she did not write the entire book from a femdom viewpoint. She changes up the orientations, describing various scenes and aspects from an M/F POV as well as F/M and some F/F. And for another, she is funny, warm and compassionate. Clearly, she understands the bottom psyche, even though she is not one herself.
According to Ms. Forbes, one of the hallmarks of a good top is the ability to command authority without being abusive. I couldn’t agree more.
Finally, for those who have considered going pro, there are chapters at the end with thorough information dedicated to this subject.
For an engaging and informative read on our beloved kink, I recommend this book heartily!