Correspondence Hall of Shame, 6/24
Been mighty quiet around these parts — where the hell is everyone? Perhaps a few Friday laughs will bring you around.
Today’s first offering is from a 19-year-old (can these guys count?? Do they have any idea how much older 53 is than 19?):
i love ur long legs and booty ;]
Ah, thanks, babe. And I love that sweet li’l soft spot on the crown of your head.
i too luv 2 spank on my buttoks
You know, it’s a lot more fun when someone else spanks your buttoks.
hello sexy lady llike to enjoy my dick on cam 2 cam lets hv cam chat on yahoo messenger
I prefer to enjoy dick person to person, thank you. And what does “hv” stand for?
Wow that is a lovely bottom. Especially for your age (I bet you hate hearing that).
You’d win that bet. And yet, you said it anyway, asshat.
And here’s the Gem of the Week:
OK, now I know what “hv” stands for — Heavy Vomit. Gaaaaaaa! Definitely brings a whole new meaning to “kiss my ass.”
Here’s a tip, Junior. Do not liken a woman’s lips to her anus. It’s a very unattractive and unflattering image.
A side note before I close: I’m thinking about joining Twitter. Not because I think I have a lot of fascinating tweets in me (really, how much can you say in 140 characters?), but because so many people I know are on there and I’d like to follow them. But I’m resisting, because it’s yet another way to waste time on the Internet.
So who belongs, and who tweets? Why should (or shouldn’t) I take this up?
Have a great weekend, y’all.