New Guy called me tonight from the road; he was stuck on the 134 Freeway and it was not moving. Not at all. In fact, he called 10 minutes later and said it still hadn’t moved, so he was going to be a while.
I checked one of the traffic websites, and sure enough, there was an accident on the 134 West. So he was 40 minutes late. Very frustrating drive.
Y’all know where this is going, right?
Of course! It was all MY fault. Because he wouldn’t have been on that damn freeway in the first place if he weren’t coming to see ME.
Hey, I didn’t tell those idiots to crash into each other! I didn’t send out a bulletin telling half the people in L.A. to get on the freeway at the same time. However, these logical points merely disintegrated into the Top Ether.
“I’m going to take my road rage out on your bottom,” he growled.
“Why can’t you get a gun like everyone else?” I blurted.
“Because this is more fun, and far less jail time.”
A couple of minutes later, I couldn’t resist needling him a little, saying, “You know, this doesn’t really feel like road rage. It feels more like a road snit.”
“Oh yeah??” Aaaaaand, that was the end of the warmup. Me and my big mouth.
Ah, but it’s OK. I wasn’t really complaining. 🙂
Afterward, he asked if I was happy. “Oh yeah,” I gasped. He laughed. “But not too happy?”
“There are different types and degrees of happiness,” I mumbled, still spacy. “This isn’t like birthday cake happiness, it’s more like spanked into @#$%ing oblivion happiness.” Probably not the most articulate of explanations, but I think he got it.
Excellent news — the remaining four books that CreateSpace owed me were delivered today, so I was able to give NG his signed copy.
My face is a bit overexposed, but I still like this shot — Lookie! Me and my book! 🙂
I need to stop clicking on CreateSpace every five minutes to check on sales. Obsessive much, Erica?
Thanks for another lovely Monday, not-so-New Guy. 🙂