Erica Scott: Life, Love and Spanking

Ruminations, opinionated observations, darkly humorous blathering and the occasional rant from an outspoken spanko and unapologetic attention wh–, um, hog.

Are you ready for this?

You may want to sit down. I don’t think y’all have ever seen me quite like this. And you probably won’t again, so you’d better memorize it. I may come to my senses tomorrow and take it down. 🙂

OK, so the naked thing is nothing new. The collar? That’s another story.

Allow me to backtrack to the beginning of this evening, if I may.

When ST first arrived, he asked me how I was doing. He already knew, having read my blog. And I’m sure he knew I needed to blow off some details. I can talk to him about this stuff. He is as discreet as the day is long. And he’s a switch himself, so he understands.

He sat quietly and let me vent a bit about my frustrations with the domme/slave thing. When he sensed I was finished, he did an assessment — perhaps it was subconscious on his part, or maybe it was deliberate. He knew I wanted and needed to be edgy tonight. I craved to be pushed, challenged, unnerved a bit. I needed to let go.

“I could use a beck-and-call girl, myself,” he mused, winding his hand into my hair and tightening his fist. “I think I should make you MY little spank slave.”

“Right,” I scoffed.

“I have a collar and leash right here in my bag,” he said, watching my face closely. “I think I should put it on you, what do you think?”

He was checking with me. I knew it. I blustered, “Oh my god! You’ve GOT to be @#$%ing kidding me!”

But I didn’t say no. And so the collar went around my neck.

Only with someone I trust this much, would I go there. I constantly amaze myself with the things I’m willing to do with him, things that are so out of my little play box. And tonight, that was just what I needed.

He made me crawl into my bedroom on my hands and knees, and once I was on the bed, I had to take off all my clothes. But not before I had one last moment of defiance.

After that, I was subdued rather quickly. Especially when the clothes came off and the ropes came out. Collared and tied, I was helpless.

“Now I can do anything I want, can’t I,” he taunted. “And you can’t do a thing about it.”

No, I couldn’t.

And oh, it hurt.

“You’re not going to scream, are you?” he growled in my ear. I shook my head vigorously. “Perhaps I should MAKE you scream.”

But somehow, I didn’t. I cried, I smashed my face into the bedspread. But I did not scream. I did say please, please… “Please what? Please show you some mercy?” “Yes, please,” I sobbed. “I’ll think about it,” he said.

After the tears began, he softened a bit. He untied the rope and took off the collar. But the spanking went on for quite a while after that.

He paused, hovering over me. “Are you getting what you need?”

“Yes.”

“Do you need some more?”

“Yes, please.”

He obliged.

“Go on, let it out,” he murmured as I wept. I did. It felt so, so damned intensely good. The knots in my stomach and chest dissolved. All the tension flowed out with my tears.

I don’t know how he always knows just what to do, where to take me. He asked me if I liked it. I answered as honestly as I could: “I liked it with you.” I don’t believe I’ll ever fetishize that degree of D/s. It’s not me. But freefalling a bit, knowing he’s there to catch me, is damned hot.

Reluctantly, he finally let me put some clothes back on.

But just for the record, we did do another scene. This time with canes. Dammit, canes really hurt when you’re already sore. I had some choice utterances.
“You’ve invoked both God and Jesus — want to try for the Holy Ghost?” he teased.
“I wish you were a ghost,” I snapped. “Then you could disappear.”
I never learn. Fortunately, he’s willing to come back, again and again, to try to teach me. 🙂
Thank you for being here for me.

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26 thoughts on “Are you ready for this?

  1. I figured you would get some kind of release tonight. ST seems to know what you need although a bit on the odd side, I would say. You know me. LOL Thing is, maybe you will feel a bit better now. I hope so.

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  2. Bobbie Jo — yeah, I know. 🙂 It's OK. When you trust someone so completely, you can take some unusual detours on the kinky path at times.

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  3. I am not sure this will be the last picture publication of scenes like this one. I am sure this will not the the last scene – your fascination and joy are too apparent.

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  4. "You've invoked both God and Jesus — want to try for the Holy Ghost?" he teased."I wish you were a ghost," I snapped. "Then you could disappear."What great lines!

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  5. Erica, those beautiful photo's of you. Show all your 'Ass'ettes. From top to bottom, and everything deliciously inbetween.

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  6. Interestingly enough, my very first real memory of you is on a discussion board vehemently stating your opinion about collars. ;)Erica

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  7. Greetings Erica.Actually the pictures are quite nice. I do believe that you should keep them up. I know that you have a dim view regarding collars, cuffs and ropes due to your encounters with LA S/Mers. But there really is nothing wrong with them,with the right person involved as well as in the right situation. I am glad that you had fun with this. Perhaps you could regulate such play for those special times when you need to go beyond what you normally do. Consider it your version of "edge play". 🙂

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  8. WOW Erica this scene was totally HOT :-)I never seen you wear a collar cause you usually don't play like that like you said,but i think it looks COOL on you it looks fun :-)I think it's so nice that you have a trusted Top that you can get your needs ment by :-)and not be afraid that he will go overboard with things that your not comfortable doing.YOU ROCK ERICA AND ST.Thanks for sharing i really enjoyed this.I am happy that you got all your stress and feelings out, we all need to do that.Much Love and hugs from your naughty girl Jade XOXO

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  9. Oh Erica! You not only stepped outta the box.. you are lucky enough with ST to open Pandora's box every now and again! LOLST continues to act in a consistent and beneficial manner with you, and due to that, for you…assurance is deepened, and trust builds and builds. This allows you to explore something not the norm for you… so that you can get those emotional releases you SO NEED!Whatever the level of conscious trust you and ST have with each other, it ultimately depends on the strength of the emotional trust connection that the two of you have. Why we find "needs" to do the things we do, that push our limits is probably due to our emotional state. (and you were in one this week!) There is no trust-o-meter that can fathom emotional trust. But it can be so wonderful, when our feelings are unclouded by our tricky consciousness. (smiles)GREAT BLOG!

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  10. MrJ — if you're talking about future photos with collars, I think you may be mistaken. This was a one-time deal, not my thing, and not ST's either. Just being edgy, because we can.OBB — yup, we're not just kinky, we're witty too! :-Dsix — thank you. :-)Sarah — trust me, the opinion is still the same! Know what? ST confessed afterward that he'd never actually put that collar on anyone before. He'd just had it in his bag forever. Probably a spare for his dog!Loki — it's not so much the collars, ropes, etc. that I have a dim view of. They're just objects. It's the D/s demeanor, that oppressive, all-consuming "you are my property" thing that makes me uncomfortable. Even in our edgiest moments last night, ST and I were still playful.Jade — absolutely, I know ST will never go overboard. That's why I can go to the edge with him. It feels so good to have that kind of trust. :-)Zelle — you are so right. I know I was opening myself up for a world of teasing when I posted that photo, but you know, I didn't care. I know why I went there, and I know it wasn't about my suddenly morphing into a sub. It was about knowing I could wander into a dark place with him, I'd be safe, and I could come back out. 🙂

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  11. @Erica: I guessed as much. But as I said before the "your are my property" aspect is not common place within the S/M scene. I can vouch for that. More, I can prove it.

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  12. Isn't it weird how "edgy" is something different for everyone? Collars represent safety and security to me, but I totally know where you're coming from with the More Pompous Than Thou BDSM D/S crowd. I'm glad you were able to let go enough to find the release you needed, whatever the tools. And I love that even collared and bound you were still sassy and very much not submissive 🙂

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  13. Pandora — LOL! I was submissive for about five minutes. Then I recovered. 😉 Sometimes, it's a relief to just let go. Do you know what a challenge it is coming up with those zingers all the time??

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  14. EricaMany vanilla folks would see this session as someone taking advantage of you and some would even see it as abusive. However for us non-vanilla types what you experienced is the essence of why we engage in our kinks. When trusting partners play together and truly seek the best for each other we are able to fully open ourselves to the deeper experience of a session. This is more than just achieving subspace it is what I believe is the cleansing and healing aspect of play. It can only occur when one is truly connected with their partner and totally trust them. It is what makes us really experience the sense of peace and acceptance that comes from such a session. It is something that our vanilla friends will never understand or grasp the beauty of, but it is what keeps us coming back for more. I am very glad you were able to have such a rewarding experience.

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  15. VBB — thank you, dear. I know you truly get it. It's so hard to explain, for me anyway — when I play in such an out-of-character manner, it's purely about trust. It's because I know he won't harm me or damage my psyche that I can let myself be so vulnerable.

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  16. Fascinating. But what you said above clearly explains it. We do different things with people we trust and admire, with people who we know can take us to the head space we need (and with people who know the amount of pain we need, or how far to push us and how to bring us back). A lot of what happens behind closed doors, in my kinky life, I don't think I could ever write about because I fear people wouldn't understand, would think it was too sick or even abusive. There are fewer than a handful of people I play really hard with, but I know I can trust them. Even an extremely "serious" (or hard) scene to me is at its heart play. So I get completely where you're coming from. It's your play.Always look forward to your adventures.sandy

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  17. Wowza! Isn't it wonderful when you have someone you know so well and trust that you can explore things you would never have imagined doing before? I've had various limits (or so I thought, lol) blow right out the window when I felt really safe with someone. I'm so happy that you and ST have each other. If only everyone was so lucky.

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  18. Sandy — hey you! Long time no talk. :-)It IS hard to talk about these things sometimes, because the viewpoint of what's over the top is so subjective. To some, the way I play is disturbing sometimes. To others, my scenes are lightweight. I share about them because I know that for the most part, people will relate to at least part of what I detail. And also because there's a part of me that's thinking, "Wow, I went there" and I feel like talking about it. 🙂

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  19. Lea — oops! You posted just as I was replying to Sandy. Yeah, it's wonderful, all right. And it never gets old. I love what I do every bit as much, years later, as when I first started. Because I have experienced quality. 🙂

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  20. OH! Mwahahahaha…..my Master and i had the *same* exchange last weekend…"God and Jesus"…omgoodness…this made me laugh out loud.(and yes, canes are a bee-atch on an already tenderized butt!!)*wicked smile* (my own ass is…very tender, three days later…i feel the pain, i really do!!)Having fun reading your blog, and will add you to my blogroll! nilla

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  21. nilla — welcome! Yeah, considering I'm an atheist, it's quite bizarre how often I invoke those names. 🙂

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  22. First, the pictures: May I just say "aaaamaaraahhana". This as as close to a drooling idiot comment as one can make in print.Second, to your back and forth banter. It's like reading the script to His Girl Friday in some Spanking Twilight Zone world. Love it.Adios, mi amiga,Chev

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  23. Chev — any man who can make a "His Girl Friday" reference, especially linking it to ME somehow, is definitely a friend of mine! 😀 Thanks.

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  24. Cheeses Priced!!I gotta look at the blogs better, I damn near missed this.I had two immediate reactions to the first pic: "YOWZA!!" and, like Ray Stevens in "The Streak, "YEW getcher CLOSE awn!!" Okay, it really was more "YOWZA!!" but "Ethel, you shameless hussy!" is funny to type.I'm admiring with a trained artistic eye (yes, artistic, yes) the form you've worked so hard to sculpt, and combined with the trademark sassy humor sparkling in your eyes, it makes a sizzling sexy picture indeed.Another intimately captivating story, Erica; thank you!

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  25. Wolfie — Cheeses priced?? ROFL! Where do you GET this stuff? Gawd, you make me giggle.Thank you, sweetie. But who the heck is Ethel? 🙂

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  26. She sang a song on stage about buns coming up rosey.

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