(My fellow Twilight Zone fans will recognize the evil Talky Tina from the “Living Doll” episode.)
On FetLife the other night, a friend commented about how she’d love to get an Erica Scott doll for Christmas, so she could pull her string and anticipate the smart-ass comments that would come out of her. Now there’s an idea, i thought. We have Chatty Cathy; why not Bratty Erica?
Picture it — a doll in my likeness, programmed with some of my signature phrases. She’d have to be brunette, of course (why are so damn many dolls blondes?), and no pigtails or ruffly baby-doll dress, thankyouverymuch. Maybe a short skirt and a tank top with some pithy saying on it. She could have my smirky face. And when you pull her string, you hear a selection from a large repertoire. For example:
1. “I have TWO cheeks, dammit!”
2. “You want me to say I’m sorry? OK. I’m sorry you’re such an ass.”
3. “Masters are for genies, and I don’t live in a bottle.”
And so on. First 100 orders get a bonus: a selection of miniature broken implements!
If you had your own signature doll, what would he/she say?