Erica Scott: Life, Love and Spanking

Ruminations, opinionated observations, darkly humorous blathering and the occasional rant from an outspoken spanko and unapologetic attention wh–, um, hog.

Interchangeable asses — what a concept!

A couple of days ago, I saw a post in FetLife Classified Ads that made my brain explode. Yeah, yeah, yeah, no judging, people have their own kinks, blah blah blah. Shut up. Some things are just blecchhhhh.

In dire need of destroying a new slaves ass. Any anal whores wanting a sadistic ass master message me.

So, I pasted this charming tidbit into a Twitter post, adding, “Really, who could resist this?”

I got several tweets in response. This morning, I received this one from Spanking Blog:

“Anal whores with extra asses they want destroyed are flocking to him even as we type!”

I laughed out loud. Ha! Who’s got spare asses lying around the house? Then my feverish brain started sparking.

What about it, bottoms? Professional spankees? Frequent party attendees? What if we all had extra bottoms, ones we could swap out when necessary? Consider the possibilities!

First, the most obvious. Played too hard? Burned yourself out on Friday night of a party weekend? Got several shoots in a row and your ass is grass after the first one? No problem! Simply whip out one of your extra bottoms, switch it out, and you’re good to go!

But that’s not all. These extra bottoms could come with myriad custom features. Playing with a top who likes a mini-butt? Use your Victoria Secret Model spare bottom. Top prefers a bit more padding? Easy. Use the J-Lo version. 

Playing with an Edward Sissyhands top? Whip out your Ultrasensitive bottom, which derives pleasure and stimulation from the wimpiest of swats. And for the tops with iron hands and paddles like boat oars? The Super Deluxe Kevlar.

And, without getting too graphic, we could even have versions with extra-strong, super-elastic back doors. You know, for those who enjoy playing hard back there, but don’t want to be torn to shreds, or incontinent before they’re 50. “Wait, honey! Don’t lube up that Mas Grande plug just yet. Let me switch to the Porn-Star butt.”

Oh, and of course, these spare bottoms would be self-exercising and toning. Having a bad ass day? Wanna rock that skin-tight new dress? Forget Spanx and control-top pantyhose! New ass, new you!

I really like this idea, folks. Would one of you inventor types get on it? It’s the future of spanking! This spankee has just finished bottoming to an entire football team, brandishing every toy in the Cane-iac collection. But you’d never know it, not with her Interchangeable Ass!

I can see only one potential drawback to this invention. Whenever someone tells you to “haul ass,” you’d have to make more than one trip.

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19 thoughts on “Interchangeable asses — what a concept!

  1. Erica, I have news for you, but please don't tell anyone in outerspace, on the other planets, such as Mars, Jupiter, Venus, Etc, Etc. Etc. Scientists think they may have E.T.'s up there. And it is possible these so called 'aliens, have features that are different then ours. But LIKE our planet, they also have 'ARSEHOLE'S.aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa


  2. Make certain to preserve each ass in it's "freshly-spanked" state, so that on a lonely night when you really need to "feel the burn", just slip it on!:"let's see… decisions decisions…. how about tonight we try the "six of the best with the rattan cane" nup, too much. How about the "razor strop in the barn – no warmup" nawwwww – let's seeeeeeeee oh, here we go! "Daddy's paddle w/ holes" (erica slips it on and proceeds to shudder and moan)BobDJ


  3. Six — yeah, I guess some things are universal.Bob — good idea! Oh, and another feature to consider: For those who travel with their interchangeable asses, we could make them collapsible!


  4. Your creative post brought the following to mind:Genetic/technological progress is so unstoppable, it's probably only a matter of time till we start re-engineering humans…. So naturally I fantasize about what if spankos get in on that. For sure, we'll have spankers with tireless arms, hard hands, ultra accurate aim and body-language reading ability….. Spankees will have ultra sensitive and shapely bottoms that never wear out and redden to perfection. Spankers and spankees will both have enhanced responses to play in the form of arousal and even orgasm.


  5. Bare Spanker — I suppose, eventually, that degree of perfection would become boring. But it would be fun for a good long while! πŸ˜€


  6. Yes with stem cell research and the cloning of sheep this is obviously the next step. Especially for those few who are butt challenged. It would be an amazing race for the cure. Jon


  7. This an A PLUS for Awesome inventions all across the board. :)Love the incontinent reference, too. God knows with some of the Fetlife lunacy posted, this is PROBABLE for some people.


  8. Jon — butt challenged! The mind reels with possibilities on the specifics of that…Kelly — well, unpleasant as that is, it happens. That area was not biologically programmed to accommodate large objects, like a woman's vagina can stretch to birth a baby. Eventually, the sphincter can cease to function. (shudder)


  9. Hi Erica — HEHEHE LOL This is a GREAT idea :-)beside's changing asses for a spanking someone could have a interchangeable ass so they can't feel a hemorrhoid cause they are VERY annoying,especially when it has cut's on there with it,HAHAHAHAHA LOL :-)much Love and hug's from naughty girl Jade


  10. Jade — well… true.


  11. EricaCould you spare a little tush, the one with the little dimples, for a Crankyspanker down on his luck? Way too much time on my hands, but the possibilities. :}Emanuele


  12. Haha, love this idea! And I'm ROFL at "Edward Sissyhands!" I'm going to be really tempted to use that one!


  13. Emanuele — maybe I could, if you called it something else! :-)Lea — I first used that about six years ago, when Danny bruised his hand on me. One of my more inspired moments, I think! πŸ˜€


  14. How funny! You should be in comedy writing. LOL I can just see it now. Tops could carry these along and adjust the bottom for what they want as well. Then the fun really starts as both top and bottom want to change bottoms just for the fun of it. Just slip them on and voila! A new sensation.


  15. Bobbie Jo — like father, like daughter? πŸ™‚ Nah. Too much pressure to be funny when you're doing it for a living.


  16. Sounds like a nice idea! πŸ™‚ How about a similar feature for tops? Interchangeable hands – the right pair for every spankee and scene. A great invention especially for newbie tops and for those who can't do their jobs with bruised hands. πŸ˜‰


  17. Kaelah — I guess with both interchangeable bottoms and hands, scenes could go on forever! πŸ˜€


  18. Oh please please PLEASE make the Kevlar one. I will pay you top dollar. No pun intended. πŸ˜€


  19. Ana — I suspect some people are already in possession of it! πŸ™‚


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