Erica Scott: Life, Love and Spanking

Ruminations, opinionated observations, darkly humorous blathering and the occasional rant from an outspoken spanko and unapologetic attention wh–, um, hog.

An informal poll for my readers

Well, not really a poll; more of a single question.

On FetLife, there was a thread running about what we call ourselves. What should become our defining word, our recognizable identifier. The most standard one now seems to be “spanko.” 

However, not everyone likes spanko. Me, I love it. It’s concise, it’s specific, it’s easy to remember. But it definitely has its detractors. Eve Howard once said that it makes her think of other “o” words that are negative, like sicko and psycho. Others have said it’s too cute. Still others say that, for unknown reasons, the word simply creeps them out. One person said on Fet the other day that “spanko” evokes the same sort of revulsion in her that a lot of people have expressed they feel about the word “moist.” (For the record, moist doesn’t bother me. But if I replace “moist” with “tushy,” then I totally get how she feels.)

A Fet friend suggested “kinkster,” but I think that’s too general. That could mean one is into any kind of kink.

So, for those of us who consider spanking our main kink — how do you feel about spanko? Like it? Hate it? And if it’s the latter, what term do you think should be used instead?

Just curious. Not that it matters, because labels kinda suck anyway. But for the sake of expediency, it’s nice to have a defining term that doesn’t need to be explained — you say it, and people pretty much figure it out. 

In other news, had a wonderful and much-needed girls’ time out with Alex and SpankCake last night. It had been too long, and all three of us had a lot to get off our plates and share with caring ears. I realized after we left — we were so busy talking, we didn’t even order dessert this time! And we were in the Cheesecake Factory, for God’s sake. I love these women so, so much. ♥

I tried an experiment with my blog, after that warning page came up and one of my readers pointed out that it was not the standard warning after all, but one that claimed “some readers” had found my blog to have objectionable content. So I went into my settings; for Adult Content? I had checked No. Just for grins, I clicked Yes. Sure enough — the warning is still there, but it reverted back to the standard “This blog may contain adult content…” Well, that’s something.

I still don’t have a good feeling about this, and I’ve been told more than once that I should migrate to WordPress. Yeah, I know I should. But the thought of that overwhelms me now. I have very little computer savvy and I don’t have access to computer-savvy people who could come over and show me how to do this. And right now, I have so damn much on my plate, there isn’t room for anything else. But I will put it on the “to-do” list for the future. Blogger and Google are getting more like Big Brother every day.

And finally, since one of my commenters suggested that Blogger is annoyed with me for not posting as many red-bottomed pictures as usual and I need to put up more, well, OK. Worth a try; here ya go.

Have a great weekend, y’all.

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35 thoughts on “An informal poll for my readers

  1. Hi Erica,
    Great picture.

    As far as labels go I guess that “spanko” is the least derogatory that I have seen. I generally dislike these types of labels as they attempt to package someone into a tightly defined group which is neither positive nor helpful.


  2. Spanko comes from spankophiliac – someone who loves spanking (particularly erotic) – or spankophilia – love of or erotic gratification from spankings.
    Both of which sort of weird me out, because of the association with other psychiatric disorders.
    I also sort of think it sounds stupid.

    But, as you say, there's not really a better word for it. The long form is pretty much correct, and the short form is clear, easy to figure out even if you haven't heard it before, concise and most people are generally okay with using it.

    So I use it, and I definitely have less of an ick factor after repetition; so I figure if it works, why not?

    Regarding switching to wordpress. I would also recommend it. I can send you information about the process, if you'd like.


  3. Don — yeah, I don't care for labels either. But they exist, and they're not going away. So I figure we should choose the one least offensive one, ya know?

    Eslynne — hey, you! 😀 Spankophiliac?? Yechh! That sounds like hemophiliac. I thought it was short for “spankophile” — you know, like anglophile.

    Thanks for the offer; I will keep that in mind. I'm already receiving offers for help in PMs, too. You guys are great.


  4. I don't flinch at the word, but I don't use it myself. I'm picky about classification words. And since I still feel like kind of a noob when it comes to being apart of this world, I'm still searching for a good word that fits for me, since I have feet in both the discipline and pleasure camp. I'm fairly certain I fit the majority of people's general idea of what a spanko is, though.


  5. BTW I feel utter revulsion at the word 'tushy'. Don't care for 'fanny' either. I have a growing list of butt-words that –for whatever reason — turn me completely off.


  6. Caregiver – caretaker.


  7. I think “spanko” is perfect! As for the pictures …. Erica, I need to admit that you post the absolute best post-spanking pictures of anyone, anytime, ever. I'd most that has to do with the fact that it is your bottom usually portrayed. it is such a lovely bottom and it always he right amount of red, sometimes even a hint of a small bruise on that lovely bottom. And then, like in the beautiful picture you shared with us here, the cherry on top … your panties are still where they were when they were symbolically lowered in order to receive your spanking. Just lovely. Thank you as always!


  8. sixofthebest on said:

    Erica, as for me I LIKE the word 'SPANKO' . In my opinion it resonates sophistication. And I would be most proud to announce to the world I am one. Except, for the fact, that I hide behind my 'nom de plume' . Six of the Best'.


  9. Brat — everyone knows how “tushy” makes me want to projectile vomit, so I feel your pain.

    MrJ — sorry, but I can't go for those. A caregiver is someone who watches over the sick and the infirm elderly. And honestly, I've had enough of those to last a lifetime. 😦

    sub hub — you are so sweet. 🙂

    six — most of us hide behind a false name (including me). We have to, I'm afraid.


  10. Anonymous on said:

    With all due respect to Hitchcock, have you seen the sofa scene in Spanko??? 🙂

    I see where Eve Howard is coming from, but it's nice to have a short single word for people who are into spanking. Otherwise I have to write “spanking enthusiasts”, “the spanking community”, “people with a spanking fetish” or some other painful, long, formal variation. And then repeat it once or twice later to make it clear who “they” is.

    If I were trying my hand at writing a spanking story, I'd avoid spanko completely: it would be easy to see from the context who was doing what, and there'd be lots of spank, spanks, spanked, spanking, tushy whomping and so on.


  11. I tend to think of “Spanko” in terms of Bibliophile and Oenophile (two other communities that I'm proudly a part of). It's concise and differentiates the most important and longest standing aspect of my overall kink.


  12. I am indifferent to the term spanko when I see it in print. But I don't feel the need to identify myself as one. I simply say I love to get spanked, or I'm into spanking. Possibly because it's mostly been a passionate and very fun but also a very small part of my daily life. To me words like spanko/kinkster/fetishist, etc while NOT at all offensive to me are almost by my perception-fully engulphing a person's identity as though they live it 24/7. I don't live that way and maybe that's why I have no need to label myself. LOL


  13. Anonymous — WHAT whomping? Bleccchhhhh!

    Michael — I'm very proud that I didn't have to look up oenophile. 😀

    Kelly — I get that. I certainly don't live it 24/7, myself, but I do consider it enough of a part of my identity that I like an easy name for it. 🙂


  14. Anonymous on said:

    I offered to give a nice lady that works at plaza I maintain a birthday spanking as it was her BD. She asked me if I really did want to spank her and why. She was obviously curious but in this worl climate you had to be careful.
    I simply told her I was a spankophile and the offer still stood. She just nodded sagely at that statement. She drive by me house on her way home and to my surprise she stopped that afternoon.
    Long story short; she wanted to know what a Spankophile was and did.
    So I showed her.
    At 40 years old she got her first fun spanking, a fantasy she admitted she had never acted on before.
    Yeah; for me; Spankophile fits.



  15. Hi Erica,

    I didn't see either the adult warning or the other Blogger warning when someone complains about offensive content. You have been healed!

    I wouldn't change to WordPress. I have a vanilla site there, and it is definitely not as user-friendly as Blogger.

    Now, to answer your question. I had a brunch discussion about this word in the past year, and there were a lot of opinions about the word. Personally I didn't like it at first, because it seemed rather slangy and derogatory. I'm quite used to it now, and it no longer offends me, but I prefer spankophile.



  16. I already know you don't like caregiver <> caretaker but I like them. No chance in a zillion years that spanko will morph into them, either. A “-plile” is more sophisticated than an “o”. Too much sophistication for everyday use?


  17. Love that red bottom picture. Beautiful.

    As for the word, it is not something I say to anyone any way, but I know in my heart that I am a spanko. It suits me. If someone did ask me about spanking, I might be inclined to say I am a spanko. But conversations with friends/coworkers rarely get into the topic realm of sex or spanking.


  18. I do agree with the idea that blogger is annoyed with you, because their are not enough pictures of your red bare bottom. Why else would blogger be annoyed with you.
    I personally do not like the term spanko, as it is too categorizing, and a negative tone. We should all keep searching for a better word..
    Anal sex became pegging, and pegging is a great word.. whereas anything that starts with anal is derogatory.
    bottoms up


  19. Poppa — good for you!

    Hermione — whoops… I didn't realize you'd already covered it with your brunch chat. As for WordPress, the only reason why I'm considering it is because Blogger is so big-brother-ish, and seems to be getting more so. We'll see.

    Jon — I guess “phile” might be a bit too sophisticated, but I do like it. 🙂

    Baxter — yeah, probably not a good idea with co-workers. 😉

    Red — how the hell did “pegging” become the term? What do pegs have to do with it? (shaking head)


  20. Hi Erica — I consider myself a Spanko because in my heart that's what I truly am,even though I don't live it 24/7 either 🙂 I am a spankee cause I only get spanked.I like your pic it's so cool.nothing like a nice red bum 🙂 What do you think of the word Spankster? It's something I made up LOL 🙂 It sounds kind of stupid though.Much Love and hugs from naughty girl Jade/ Emily Jean


  21. Anonymous on said:

    I think the term “pegging” might have originated with the practice of sitting on (or otherwise using) a wooden peg for stimulation.


  22. Jade — actually, I've heard “spankster” before. It works.

    Anonymous — *shuddering*


  23. Anonymous on said:

    Eve Howard uses the term “spanking enthusiast”. That's a little too wordy for me. I personally prefer the term “spanko” but then I'm not on FetLife and the only time that I use the term is when I'm posting comments here.


  24. Anonymous on said:

    Whoops! Color my face red. I hit “publish” too soon. I forgot sign my name.



  25. Mike — no worries. 🙂


  26. I noticed that you self-identify, in your description at the beggining of the blog, as an “outspoken kinkophile”. Are you just using that a term to identify as a spanking enthusiast or are ther other “kinks” you participate in? I think “spankophile” is a sophisticated term, but as an identifier, especially in a more public space or amongst people who you may not want to be to self-descriptive, that it's a little TOO revealing. I like “TTWD”. You can, if pressed, reveal what the letters stand for and then make something up for what the “thing” is, unless you're entirely comfortable around the people you're with. THEN you can call yourself a spanko or spankophile!


  27. smuccatelli — I think I chose to say “kinkophile” because it was a broad term and left things open, but it's probably not accurate. I'm not really into other kinks. I've dabbled in several, experimented, etc., but spanking is what really flips my switch. TTWD is good, if you want to say, “I'm into…” rather than “I am a…”


  28. Erica: I think that is why the word peg has been adopted. Maybe the artificial cock is an appendage, who knows, but it removes the word ANAL, which has negative connotations.
    Spanko is too close to sicko and psycho, and is something done with love or at least affection, with terms as Jade/ Emily Jean talk of a nice red bum, and I would definitely vote for spankster, which has a wonderful connotation, similar friendly thoughts when you know someone who might be called a hipster.
    bottoms up


  29. I spank, therefore I am.

    Not fond of any of the titles honestly, and haven't ever really heard one I like. Within those who know of spanking, “spanko” is fine. If I am trying to explain to someone who is not into spanking the allure of it all I would not use the word “spanko”. It is to similar to “psycho” which to many outside the circles, a much too close judgmental connection.


  30. Enzo — in trying to explain to vanillas, I don't think there's any term out there that would make them get it.


  31. I always thought spanko was short for spankophile. I don't particularly care for the word spanko but I think it's probably the term that best describes our niche fetish. I wish there were a better word, but I'm not sure what that might be.


  32. Beth — yeah, I don't know either. Maybe someday a new word will develop.


  33. OK, simple answers, I love spanko, totally explains us…..and funny when you say the word to another person, one who is a spanko, well walls come down.


  34. Oh and I just love the pictures of your bottom especially in a panty, well spanked!


  35. Ron — just make sure the other person you say it to really IS another spanko, or else those walls shoot up fast!


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