Erica Scott: Life, Love and Spanking

Ruminations, opinionated observations, darkly humorous blathering and the occasional rant from an outspoken spanko and unapologetic attention wh–, um, hog.

The art of clever bratting

Yeah, I’m still here. I figured I’d come back when I had something fun to post. Today, I do.

In my nearly 20 years in the scene, people have often read my thoughts on bratting, a spanko behavior that has a bad reputation with many. Why? Because it’s not done cleverly and with a light touch — too often, it’s executed in a heavy-handed manner that is more annoying than provocative. I’ll reiterate my personal favorite metaphor: Clever bratting is a feather tickling a top’s nose, not an anvil slamming onto his foot.

Good bratting is a tease, and if done right, should make the top smile in spite of himself. He should want to spank the minx’s bottom, not wring her neck.

What got me started on this? Recently, Sarah Gregory released a video, starring Kajira Bound and UlfSayer, called “Lumberjack Spanking.” In it, U played a Canadian lumberjack (complete with green flannel plaid shirt) and K is a bratty American, making fun of him until he decides to take her in hand. You can read about it here, and in the meantime, here’s a picture:


What of it? Of course, being of a certain age, I couldn’t help but think of Monty Python when I saw this, and their classic “Lumberjack Song.” A show of hands — who hasn’t heard of it? Who hasn’t heard of Monty Python? (Spankos, of course you have, even if you don’t think so. Who among us has never heard the lines “Bad Zoot! Naughty Zoot!”) Anyway, for those who don’t recall, the Lumberjack Song starts out with a man singing about being all macho and slowly slides into a ditty about a cross-dresser, while his sweetheart goes from beaming happily to openly weeping. (No, it’s not politically correct. But come on, it’s Monty Python.)

In a mischievous moment, I took this link, pasted it into a tweet, and posted it to K & U, since we all follow one another on Twitter. I figured it was good for a giggle or two.

But Kajira grabbed the brat ball and ran with it.

Last weekend, while John and I were at lunch, I was thumbing through my Twitter notifications and saw that U had replied to my tweet (which K had liked, retweeted and commented on). It seems the alarm on his phone had “somehow” been changed to the Lumberjack Song.

I burst out laughing in the middle of the restaurant, no doubt startling everyone around me. Brilliance. Sheer brilliance.

But wait, there’s more. Today, U tweeted that K had also purchased napkins in a plaid flannel pattern. I damn near fell off my chair.

This, my friends, is a classic example of clever bratting. It’s funny. It’s creative. It harms no one, insults no one, doesn’t mess up anyone’s clothes or break anything. The payback will be as fun as the execution of the prank. Silly String and water guns are for the Brat Bush League. Kajira has firmly established herself as being in the Majors.

I’m so proud.

As an aside, I’ve had an affinity for the Lumberjack Song for a long time. Years ago, when we were at Shadow Lane, John began a tradition of singing to me, when I couldn’t get out of bed during the day:

♪ She’s a cutie-pie and she’s OK,
She’s spanked all night and she sleeps all day!♫


(To everyone who commented on my last post, or who wrote to me, who cared, thank you. I’ll have more about that another time. Today, I just wanted some fun.)

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23 thoughts on “The art of clever bratting

  1. Loved it, I know some brats that could learn from your post, you should post it on Fetlife…


  2. wthwing — thanks. Nah… posting something like this on FetLife would get me flamed and accused of some sort of perverse elitism. One of the many reasons why I deactivated my profile there for a while. *rolling eyes*


  3. I haven’t even read this newest blog yet, but was just so gosh darn happy to see its email notice waiting for me in my inbox that it made me smile, at a time that does not come easily. Oh, it is good to see you feeling better, my friend. Very good. Now I will read the blog post!


  4. Pam — you’re sweet. I hope the post gave you a giggle!


  5. I was pretty excited to see that you had posted too!

    I like this kind of bratting because it is lighthearted, playful, and fun.

    I’m having a heck of a time posting anything…I was going to post something on my birthday but that didn’t happen. I guess I’ve just been pretty depressed given what was going on during this time last year. (sigh)


  6. “He should want to spank the minx’s bottom, not wring her neck.”

    That is a nice clear, simple rule of thumb.

    If they are in a spanking relationship, she really ought to have a pretty good idea which one would be his reaction.

    Welcome. Missed you.


  7. Jay — I’m sorry you’re feeling low. Don’t push yourself to post. You will when the muse grabs you.

    Mark — thank you. 🙂


  8. Why don´t you find your friends and organize a Brat of the Year contest?
    I’m sure that would be lots of fun to lots of us. 😉


  9. I love John’s version of the lumberjack song. Growing up with MP, we still quote from them all the time.


  10. Very weak lumberjack spanking.


  11. Anonymous on said:

    Since you mentioned it, I’m afraid someone has to post a link 🙂 :


  12. Yes, thank you, Erica! Everyone needs to be reminded of the Joys of Subtlety! Kudos to Kajira! Hooway for a retuwn of wit!! Oh, sorry, I got all Fuddled there for a minute.


  13. Jadelyn Mathias on said:

    Hi Erica ♡ I am so happy that you are back 🙂 I missed you so much. The Lumberjack song is so funny LOL 😉 I totally agree with what you wrote about bratting, Thank you for sharing 🙂 I like John’s version of the Lumberjack song it’s cute and funny 😉 ♡ Much Love and hugs always from naughty girl Jade / Emily Jean xxxxx ♡


  14. CarolBeth on said:

    Erica, it’s really nice to see a post from you.

    I’m not a Monty Python admirer, but I did find this very amusing.


  15. MrJ — I don’t know that anyone wants that particular award! 🙂

    DelFonte — they are definitely very quotable.

    Mimi — ?

    Anonymous — of course someone had to! “And after the spanking, the oral sex!”

    Dave — wit is something you are never wit-out, my friend.

    Jade — glad you liked it.


  16. CarolBeth — sorry, your comment came in while I was commenting. Monty Python is an acquired taste. I confess, I’ve never been much into them either. I just like a select few highlights. The sick f*** side of me howls whenever I see them nailed up on crosses, warbling “Always Look on the Bright Side of Life.”


  17. Chibob on said:

    A few years ago Audrey Knight and Richard Windsor did a little Christmas video that I think is a good example of what you say about subtle bratting. Windsor was dressed as Santa and Audrey santa’s helper. Her playful bratting and banter made it one of my all time favorites.
    Maybe you saw the clip. Maybe not. I still smile when I think of it.
    Glad to see you posting again.


  18. Chibob — I have not seen that one, although I’ve seen photos. It sounds cute.


  19. 4lasdhair on said:

    My favourite Python sketch wasn’t actually by Monty Python…


  20. Anonymous on said:

    Wow …. that was quite a narrative … have not checked in to your blog since December …. sounds like you came through the storm with flying colors .. that’s what relationships are for yes? California is a world away from Chicago in so many ways almost wish I was still making my semi annual trip to MDR for sailing but gave it up .. I do miss my friends out there. Anyway glad feel better ….

    Your OLD Pal

    The Grinch


  21. Grinch — hello! Strange to see you in the middle of May. 🙂


  22. Pingback: Shadow Lane 2016 | Erica Scott: Life, Love and Spanking

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