Erica Scott: Life, Love and Spanking

Ruminations, opinionated observations, darkly humorous blathering and the occasional rant from an outspoken spanko and unapologetic attention wh–, um, hog.

I love being a woman…

… but sometimes, it fucking sucks.
I found this on Facebook. Make of it what you will. I am quite speechless.

“Be a Lady” They Said

By Unknown Author on Friday, January 12th, 2018

“Be a Lady” They Said…

Remove your body hair. Shave your legs. Shave your armpits. Shave your bikini line. Wax your face. Wax your arms. Wax your eyebrows. Get rid of your mustache. Bleach this. Bleach that. Lighten your skin. Tan your skin. Eradicate your scars. Cover your stretch marks. Tighten your abs. Plump your lips. Botox your wrinkles. Lift your face. Tuck your tummy. Thin your thighs. Tone your calves. Perk up your boobs. Look natural. Be yourself. Be genuine. Be confident. You’re trying too hard. You look overdone. Men don’t like girls who try too hard.

“Be a Lady” They Said…

Wear makeup. Prime your face. Conceal your blemishes. Contour your nose. Highlight your cheekbones. Line your lids. Fill in your brows. Lengthen your lashes. Color your lips. Powder, blush, bronze, highlight. Your hair is too short. Your hair is too long. Your ends are split. Highlight your hair. Your roots are showing. Dye your hair. Not blue, that looks unnatural. You’re going grey. You look so old. Look young. Look youthful. Look ageless. Don’t get old. Women don’t get old. Old is ugly. Men don’t like ugly.

“Be a Lady” They Said…

Save yourself. Be pure. Be virginal. Don’t talk about sex. Don’t flirt. Don’t be a skank. Don’t be a whore. Don’t sleep around. Don’t lose your dignity. Don’t have sex with too many men. Don’t give yourself away. Men don’t like sluts. Don’t be a prude. Don’t be so uptight. Have a little fun. Smile more. Pleasure men. Be experienced. Be sexual. Be innocent. Be dirty. Be virginal. Be sexy. Be the cool girl. Don’t be like the other girls.

“Be a Lady” They Said…

Don’t talk too loud. Don’t talk too much. Don’t take up space. Don’t sit like that. Don’t stand like that. Don’t be intimidating. Why are you so miserable? Don’t be a bitch. Don’t be so bossy. Don’t be assertive. Don’t overact. Don’t be so emotional. Don’t cry. Don’t yell. Don’t swear. Be passive. Be obedient. Endure the pain. Be pleasing. Don’t complain. Let him down easy. Boost his ego. Make him fall for you. Men want what they can’t have. Don’t give yourself away. Make him work for it. Men love the chase. Fold his clothes. Cook his dinner. Keep him happy. That’s a woman’s job. You’ll make a good wife someday. Take his last name. You hyphenated your name? Crazy feminist. Give him children. You don’t want children? You will someday. You’ll change your mind.

“Be a Lady” They Said…

Don’t get raped. Protect yourself. Don’t drink too much. Don’t walk alone. Don’t go out too late. Don’t dress like that. Don’t show too much. Don’t get drunk. Don’t leave your drink. Have a buddy. Walk where it is well lit. Stay in the safe neighborhoods. Tell someone where you’re going. Bring pepper spray. Buy a rape whistle. Hold your keys like a weapon. Take a self-defense course. Check your trunk. Lock your doors. Don’t go out alone. Don’t make eye contact. Don’t bat your eyelashes. Don’t look easy. Don’t attract attention. Don’t work late. Don’t crack dirty jokes. Don’t smile at strangers. Don’t go out at night. Don’t trust anyone. Don’t say yes. Don’t say no.

Just “be a lady” they said.

– Author Unknown

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18 thoughts on “I love being a woman…

  1. Anonymous on said:

    Well, no wonder why I cried all day the other day — I’m a woman! UGH! No wonder why we’re all so hard on ourselves if this is what we hear throughout our lives! Hang in there! I will, too! Windy

    Like

    • Windy — in light of what’s going on currently, I thought this was especially poignant. Like I said, I love being a woman. I think men have their trials and tribulations aplenty too. But… yeah. I have heard all of this in my lifetime.

      A lot of it from my own mother.

      Like

  2. bklynny0856 on said:

    Be yourself Erica. That’s why I love your posts. I don’t envy you in the current climate-we’re seeing the truth about a lot of people and it’s not pretty. Can I add, “Unlike you of course?”🌹😊

    Like

  3. Dorota on said:

    seems not much has really changed since the 50s

    http://www.littlethings.com/1950s-good-housewife-guide/

    Like

  4. Jade Mathias on said:

    Hi Erica ❤ Wow there’s a lot of do’s and don’ts it gets so confusing, I just say we be who we are, You are beautiful and the BEST my Lovely friend ☺💖💗💕 much Love and hugs always from Jade / Emily Jean

    Like

    • bklynny — you can, and thank you.

      Dorota — yup. When I was an adolescent, my mother gave me this antiquated book called “Fascinating Womanhood.” I flipped through it, reading such drivel as “A woman should strive to be half human, half angel. Be Angela Human.” Even then, I knew this was utter crap.

      Jade — thank you, sweetie.

      Like

  5. Graham on said:

    Bollocks to all that, just be yourself

    Like

  6. Be a lady…how horrible. Fortunately I seem to like associating, admiring and respecting women, not ladies
    Downunder Don

    Like

  7. Chibob on said:

    It amazes me the slut shaming that still goes on. I don’t think it’s fair. Women are supposed to have sex with only one man their entire lives. Otherwise they are a slut or a whore. It’s all bullshit in my opinion. But I guess you have to conform or face the shaming. My cousin is 66 yrs old and she still calls other women whores.

    Like

  8. Don — there you go!

    Chibob — don’t forget that we’re supposed to get married and make babies too. (sigh) I did neither. Funny, I don’t feel like a failure. Screw conforming.

    Like

  9. Well, I guess you match most of the job requirements, Eriuca. ;-)(

    Like

  10. Joseoh on said:

    Yes..I am speechless, too…I know it’s a characature, but a sweeping generalisation…a woman should be herself and please her man, a man should be himself and please his woman..easy!

    Like

  11. richard herndon on said:

    You are so different than I yet we are the same mind Missed you so much when you were gone from my life l checked my phone over even tried to join fetlife to see where your mind had wandered twitter kind though you can find me there if you lucky men can be brats too

    Like

  12. J — that works for me as well.

    Richard — I’m very active on Twitter; I know you follow me there. My mind wanders into a lot of places.

    Like

  13. I don’t think that is being a lady – it’s being a doormat. No, thanks.

    Like

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