Erica Scott: Life, Love and Spanking

Ruminations, opinionated observations, darkly humorous blathering and the occasional rant from an outspoken spanko and unapologetic attention wh–, um, hog.

Correspondence Hall of Shame, a Very Special Edition

Yup, I’m still here, kids. How is everyone? How are we all holding up in this insanity? I don’t know about you, but it’s the little things that are helping to keep me sane. Things that make me laugh. Or that give me a tiny sense of empowerment in a sea of powerlessness. Hence this post.

Some things never change. Even in the midst of a pandemic, I still hear from the pervs. I’m still getting inappropriate messages. Someone asked why I haven’t done a CHoS lately, especially since I had so much material. My answer was that I really hadn’t been up for it. But then something happened this week that was different.

You guys know that in all the years I’ve been doing this, I would write (on here) what I would like to reply to the perpetrators. It was just fantasy. I never actually replied to any of them… until now. For the first time this week, I wrote back to one of them. I let them @#$%ing have it. And it felt gooooood, dammit.

On FetLife, there are “relationships” you can have with others, including sisters and brothers. I have several sisters on Fet. One of them is Alex (different Alex, not Alex Reynolds, although she’s my sister on there too). This is a very sweet young woman whom I’ve never met in person, but I’ve been in correspondence with for a couple of years and have grown to feel very protective over. Anyway, the other night, she messaged me, warning me about some creep on FetLife who was following a bunch of women and who had written very rude things to her. She then showed me a screen shot of their conversation and I saw red.

He’d written this arrogant little note to her, saying he wanted to be her dom, how much fun she could have with his “Big Dick Energy” (yes, really), and so forth. I would have not answered at all, but she politely wrote back, “No thank you.” It should have ended there. Instead, he wrote back, launching into Uber-Dom speak, saying, “That’s ‘no thank you, SIR,'” and a bunch of other drivel about her bad manners. He ended it by calling her a really nasty name.

UGH.

She blocked him, and that would have been the end of it. But nooooo. The creep saw that I’m her sister, so he then proceeded to write to me!

fetlifedick

I blocked out his FetLife name, but as you can see, the little twit is all of 24 years old. And he wrote the same “Big Dick Energy” BS to me — guess that’s his signature line? 😛 But the reference to Alex and the threesome was the last straw. I wasn’t going to let this stand. I’d reached my saturation point with these creeps.

So… I sent this back to him.

fetlifedick2

I knew I’d probably opened up a huge can of whoop-ass, but I didn’t care. If he wrote a bunch of nasty stuff back to me, I’d report him.

A few hours went by and nothing. Then later that evening, I heard back from him. I opened the message, bracing myself for abusive filth.

fetlifedick3

LOL — really? She took it the wrong way? What other way was there to take it, you Troglodyte? Still, I was shocked that he didn’t send me back a lot of righteous indignation. Guess I scared him, the little wuss. Didn’t hear from him again.

Of course, don’t think I initiated any sort of personality overhaul or anything. Next day, I found out he’d written to Alex’s “brother” and top, Zack, telling him how rude she is and how he should “tighten the leash” and punish her for her disrespect. Jeeeezus.

*groan* I wish Zack had also ripped him a new one. But he’s nicer than I am, so he tried to reason with the guy instead. Didn’t get anywhere. Oh, well. Out of my hands now, for sure. No regrets on my end. Like I said, writing that to him felt damn good. It was like striking back after years and years of getting shit like this. Empowerment!

Anyway… yeah, I know this is nothing in the overall scheme of things right now. But like I said, it’s the little things. The mini-laughs, the small victories, the fleeting moments of good feelings among the fear, the anger, the uncertainty.

I work at home, so I basically hole up all week in my apartment and stay there. I use the gym equipment in the apartment building, wiping it down first. Grocery shopping has been quite the adventure, although I have discovered the odds of finding things are better if you go early. I went at the ungodly hour of 7 a.m. this week and actually scored some toilet paper and antibacterial wipes, which I hadn’t seen in weeks. My bangs are growing into my eyes and my gray roots are spreading. I miss all the little things we take for granted every day.

John is an essential worker, so he is still going to the office three days a week, but he’s in an isolated office with no one else and all communications are done via phone and teleconferences. He works at home two days. My biggest terror over this whole situation is his vulnerability, what with his heart condition and compromised immune system. If I catch Covid-19, I’ll probably get over it. If he catches it, it could kill him.

In an effort to minimize his public contact, I go to his place on Saturday morning. Beforehand, I stop and buy all his groceries, as well as food for us for Saturday and Sunday. Then I head to his place, delouse everything and put it away, and we hunker down there until I go back home. We decided that was far less risky than his going out and buying his own necessities. Needs must and all that.

I’m grateful for work, more than I can say. I’m grateful I don’t have children or aging parents to worry about. I’m grateful I was able to pay my rent two days ago. I’m grateful for my friends who check in with me every day. I just have to ensure, a day at a time, that I don’t give in to the fear. That I don’t fall into the abyss of depression. Seeing this the other day made me laugh; I know it’s dark, I know it’s horrible, but for those of us who have been there, we get it.

suicidetweet

So. Everyone please stay safe. Stay the @#$% at home as much as you are able to. Turn off the 24/7 news; it’s not good for your mental health and well-being. Stay in touch virtually with your friends. And hang in there. Whatever you are going through, please hang in there. Somehow, we’re going to get through this goddamn pandemic, eventually. ♥ ♥ ♥

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22 thoughts on “Correspondence Hall of Shame, a Very Special Edition

  1. That guy was really freaking creepy. I’m glad you told him off.

    I’m definitely going to keep trying to share funny things that I come across, because we do all need to laugh when we can. Hopefully, things will eventually stabilize out, so we can stop experiencing all of this emotional whiplash. ❤️

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  2. That boy has a long way to go. I did want to give him a shot to try and turn his horny antic around and show he was decent, but cocky to the end. He claimed he has 2 subs that service him, and another that he’s just started, he admitted they were younger than him, I might have asked if they were over the age of consent given he’s only 24. We messaged back and forth a few more times. I’m convinced he doesn’t have any women “servicing him” and he’s fully convinced nothing he said to Alex, or anyone else, was inappropriate or disrespectful to any of you. The guy is a punk who needs a firm lesson in respect. I’m glad you blasted him the guy absolutely deserved it.

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  3. I am glad you are well, and staying careful.

    Everyone was much too nice to that creep.

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  4. Ariel on said:

    It sounds like you’ve found a workable routine. That might be the most important thing for those of us who work at home. I’m also a writer who works from home, though now my husband is furloughed, “work” is a somewhat optimistic term. It’s like one very long Sunday and I have never liked the randomness of Sundays. Is it just me, or does it seem like this quarantine and fear has already been going on forever? But. Work out, laugh at things (and people) when possible. Keep safe. Best to you and John.

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  5. Hi Erica,

    There are some really creepy characters on FL. I only visit to connect with friends I don’t encounter any other way, and then only rarely. I shouldn’t be surprised by the bizarre unsolicited messages I get, but occasionally I am. I’ve thought about doing a mailbag post, but I wasn’t sure that sharing all this stupidity would cheer up anyone. You just changed my mind. 🙂

    Please stay safe and strong!

    Warm socially distanced hugs,
    Bonnie

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  6. Bexxie on said:

    Hi Erica,

    Big Dick Energy (BDE) if you will is supposedly a good thing. It’s supposed to be confidence instead of cockiness. But, he used it to be a creepy jerk and probably lacks both the energy and the appendage, rofl. FL has those by the droves. I should count myself lucky that I haven’t gotten one in a while, though someone demanded that I read and respond that message got flushed because I was feeling surly and in a you-don’t-tell-me-what-to-do mood.

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  7. Ariel — it does feel like it’s been going on longer than it has. Just trying to stay safe and sane and not give in to fear or despair. Not always easy… but friends help.

    Bonnie — oh yes, please! I love your Mailbag posts! Much love to you.

    Bexxie — (snort) Seems to me if a guy is confident, he doesn’t need to refer to the size of his member. I dunno, this one just got under my skin — probably because I am protective of friends and he was so horribly rude to mine.

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  8. Big Dick Energy – yuck! Glad you put him in his place, although his response was odd. There are some real weirdos out there.

    Hugs from 2 metres away,
    Hermione

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    • Hermione — right? And there’s no shortage of them even during a freaking pandemic. In fact, they’ve got nothing better to do now (not that they really did before…). Hugs!

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  9. Bob in Wisconsin on said:

    I’m sorry about your misadventure with Mr. “big dick energy,” although I did find the whole exchange quite amusing.

    I know that I, too, have always been puzzled that whenever I call a woman a “fucking slut,” they ALWAYS take it “the wrong way”! I think that wannabe macho studs like that twit could never understand that respect (such as demanding to be addressed as “sir”) is earned and not given on demand. Especially after calling someone a fucking slut!

    I hope you do keep the Correspondence Hall of Shame coming from time to time, especially since comical fodder for it seems to keep coming your way. It’s one of my most favorite things about your blog. Stay safe. And be well.

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  10. Erica, I admire how you stood up for your little sis and put that creepy dude firmly in his place.

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  11. John from Australia on said:

    Dear Erica,
    Firstly so happy to know you are still safe! Mat it continue…
    Secondly, so very happy to know that your kick is still accurate…
    Keep well (from a very safe distance.

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  12. Tina — a friend once described my protectiveness toward friends as being like “a mama lioness.” Funny, since I don’t have kids — but I definitely get my back up when people mess with my friends! Thank you.

    John — haha — yes, the kick is still accurate even after all these years. You stay safe as well!

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  13. Anonymous on said:

    In reference to your reply to Mr. BDE

    Could you please take some time off from writing and run for president?

    Your country needs you!

    Anon E. Mouse

    Like

    • Mouse — HA! Noooo… that’s a headache I don’t need. Not that I couldn’t do a better job than the orange fuckface… but then again, so could a trained chimpanzee. And it would probably fling a lot less feces than the current WH inhabitant does.

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  14. Hi Erica. It doesn’t surprise me all that much that he backed down, for the most part, when you confronted him. When I first started blogging and would get nasty messages from trolls, I sort of assumed that the worst thing you could do was to confront them, because why wouldn’t that embolden them given that the anonymity of the internet protects them from any real consequences. Yet, it doesn’t seem to work that way. If you let them get away with it, they keep coming back and even ramp it up. But, if you whack them down, they often just flounce away. It’s taught me that bullies are bullies, whether in the real world or the virtual one — the best tactic is not turn the other cheek but, rather, punch them squarely in the nose.

    Dan

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    • Dan — I both agree and disagree with you. Some bullies do back off as soon as someone confronts them. I was lucky in this case; he was just a kid. But online, as you mentioned, people are protected by their anonymity. Unless you have a computer tech available to help you, you cannot find out who these people are. And they can choose to bully and harass you relentlessly, once they know they’re getting to you. They love reactions. If you don’t give them any, they could very well get bored and go bother someone else.

      It’s a tough call.

      Like

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