Erica Scott: Life, Love and Spanking

Ruminations, opinionated observations, darkly humorous blathering and the occasional rant from an outspoken spanko and unapologetic attention wh–, um, hog.

Archive for the category “CHoS”

Correspondence Hall of Shame, 1/7

Welcome to the first CHoS of 2022. Are we all settled into the new year? Hangovers long gone? Good. Here’s another set of headaches.

I would love to give you a nice coconut oil massage and eat your ass and pussy really good and give you all 10 inches of my thick cock real nice and deep and perhaps make you squirt all over it 😉 would love to give you a solid spanking

I don’t suppose you would love to give me a comma or a period somewhere in this mess, would you? banging head on desk I like how he tacks on a spanking like an afterthought.

How much and how hard do you let a special man wail on your ass?

I really would rather a man not wail on my ass. I prefer the raining of blows on it, not tears. (It’s whale, stupid.)

You seek real time Master to Own you 24/7 TPE long term?
You always been submissive and obedient?
Been owned before?
How much pain can you take?

reaching for Advil bottle
No, I do not.
I never have been.
No.
A lot. But not from you.

I want my hands all over your behind. Maybe my tongue too. I love your behind. Need to meet it soon.

(sigh) You do realize that said behind comes attached to an entire person, right? It’s not like I can detach it and FedEx it to you.

I was gonna call you beautiful but they say that beauty comes from inside and I haven’t been inside you yet.

No. You didn’t. You did not just write this to me. dumping handful of Advil into my mouth

And finally… this one is a bit of a departure. It was not written directly to me. But I was made aware that it was written about me — that I was being discussed in, shall we say, less than flattering terms. So I checked it out. Here’s the best part of it.

That girl is the most fowl[sic]-mouthed, idiotic, bitch there is, bless her heart.

Well now. (Fowl??? For cluck’s sake.)

I read on. Someone spoke up for me (thank you ♥), and then there was backpedaling, claiming that this was merely an example of how you can say the most vile things and then nullify them with heart blessing. To this, I say “Bwak bwak.” Which is hen-speak for “Bullshit.”

Ah, so many things I could say. But a friend of mine said it best. I was musing to him that since this individual is clearly obsessed with me and I’m living rent-free in their head, perhaps I should give up my apartment. And my friend replied, “Why would you want to live in such a small and ugly place?”

Boom. And mic drop.

Haters gonna hate. And now, because I’d like to cleanse my mind of this garbage, I’d like to end on a positive note. I do get a lot of nice messages too. A Twitter friend sent me this last week.

[You have a] ‘dont give a fuck’ attitude (but you do about good/sensible things), you know what you want from friends/people/politics/life *and* you also have inadvertently introduced me to the love of my life. I’m not the type to use and toss others aside, I hope you know that and I want you to know that you bring me immense happiness and joy even from afar.

Now, you see, that sort of thing makes it all worth it. ♥

By the way, my marks are all gone. I thought I’d have them through the weekend. I am a resilient little warrior.

Have a great weekend, y’all. Please be safe.

Correspondence Hall of Shame, Thanksgiving Edition

It’s the day after Thanksgiving, so here’s a bunch of leftover turkeys for you. And I’m damn thankful I don’t know any of them.

mmmm hello gorgeous, curious would u allow a man to watch u poop

Mmmmm would u please scat.

Here’s one of my favorite types who turn up now and then — the tops who think I’m a little snot who needs to be broken. Clearly, if you’re not a mewling doormat, you’re an annoyance.

I think I could have fun (at your expense, of course). I checked out one of your videos. I’d love to spank you and your attitude.

Oh hi, [notoriously sadistic scene asshole], is that you?

what a SWEET ,,,SWEET ,,,SEXY ,SEXY ,,ASS in those purple panties ,,,,oh my god ,,,,and i see your ass is red too ,,,mmmmmmmmmmmm

Dude, stop jacking off over your keyboard. Your comma is sticky.

I recently asked a question on Alt regarding men who contact me then disappear. I then received this:

In answer to your status, in regards to why men play games in this site. 1. They are simps, pusies! The generation of wimps is terrible. Take it from an old school Mann vet those player punks and seek a real man
2. They are frauds, fakes with nefarious agendas
3. Time wasting little boys who don’t know how to actually be aman let alone a dominate one.
My 2 ¢ worth

Anyone who paid two cents for this was overcharged. Sheesh. What a pusie mann. Riddle me this: How the hell did this moron know how to spell nefarious??

Good afternoon my sexy vixen I would love so much to taste that beautiful ass of yours fuck your shoes at the same time what size shoe do you wear

Uh… my shoes would be way too big for you, honey. May I suggest you get a pair of doll shoes.

And finally — oh, this one’s a charmer. On Alt, because they insist you state an age, I list mine as a lot older. I then say I’m not really that age and if they want to know, they can meet me, have a look and judge for themselves. Of course, there’s always the ones who don’t bother reading the profile, just look at the picture and the age. Hence this:

if that was a 87 year old ass this old boy Sir Xxxxx would drag his balls over broken glass just to smell where u pissed

I would rather be force-fed green bean casserole until 2022 than endure another moment of that imagery in my head. Perhaps sharing it with all of you will rid me of it. You’re welcome.

Hope everyone who celebrates it had a happy turkey day. Have a good weekend, y’all. Be safe. ♥

Correspondence Hall of Shame, 8/6

I swear, these guys are more relentless than Covid. No, they won’t kill anyone, but some of them sure do make me sick.

This first one isn’t the usual CHoS entry, but I figured it was worth a mention. A while back, I got a message on FetLife from a local man, saying he hoped we could connect. I didn’t like his FL name — I won’t post it, because I’ve always sworn I wouldn’t identify these people and I won’t start now, but suffice it to say it sounded like he thinks women exist to be receptacles for his bodily emissions. Anyway, I went to take a peek at his profile.

Ye gods.

He specializes in humiliation, degradation, objectification, “squirtology” and “bimbofication.” He “provides asshole stretching upon request.” PAWGs automatically go to the front of the line. (Do you need to Google it? Don’t bother. Phat Ass White Girls.) And he belongs to a long list of awful sounding groups; here are just some of the Cs:

Clit Discipline
Clit Enlargement
Clit Spanking
Clit Torture
Clit Worship
CPT (Clit and Pussy Torture) — The female version of CBT

And don’t even get me started on his pictures. Yeah, I don’t think so. I didn’t reply to him. And normally, that would be the end of it. Except last week, I got this:

hi again
i am still hoping to connect with you

(Why??)

I didn’t want to hear from him yet again, so I sent back three words:

No, thank you

Nothing wrong with that, right? Clear and to the point. Polite.

And then I got this:

oh dear did i just crash and burn on take-off?
thanks for letting me know.
i’ll just wait for the fire crew to get here

Really? Really?? Am I seriously getting butt-hurt, passive-aggressive indignation from this clown with his House O’ Filth profile? Hey, buddy… maybe you should stretch your own asshole. Then you could pull your head out of it.

Moving on…

Iwould love to enjoy spanking you, but with no sex at all I dont see why I would

Um… okay. And you bothered writing this to me because?

Will u be my little anal slut 😉

No.

You are write hun. OTK is the best. One ca play with all of a woman parts and drive her nuts and have her pussy dripping wet when it’s checked here and there. I like to do that every time to a woman. you can finger her every now and then teasing her. This is what I do.

Do you have a point, hun? No? Then I’m going to add you to my CHoS and delete your ass. This is what I do.

My idea of playing with you would be to get you very wet, keeping you soaked and even during a spanking sliding a few fingers or tongue down to flick the bean and make you cum

Flick the bean? Is that anything like flick the Bic? And for the quazillionth time — what part of “I’m not seeking sex” was unclear?

And finally… get your Advil ready for this one. I redacted the personal information.

hello i am a 62 year old Dominant Master/man from [city/state] i am a sex addict and love to spend hours with a warm and horny woman just making each other feel good i live alone in a older home in a small city i work 6 days a week for about another five years i love the outdoors i have a large yard i am also a smoker and not just tobacco my email is [whocares] ido have hangouts i do seek a ltr and would love to see if you could be it now i must add this to save time i wont send money dont waste your time if that is what you are after sorry i can send a plane ticket to me if we click

(clutching head) Is a side effect of too much weed making a person forget how to use punctuation? Let me get this straight: I’m supposed to get on a plane to Bumfuck, Egypt in order to meet a semi-literate stoner sex addict? No, pal, I don’t want your money. I want spanking. Which you didn’t mention even once. So I ask yet again… did you read my damn profile??

(sigh) I need to get back to work now and see if I can regenerate all the brain cells that died reading this crap. Have a great weekend, y’all. Please be safe. ♥

Correspondence Hall of Shame, 6/11

Happy Friday, kids. Don’t know about any of you, but I had a rotten week and I feel like blowing off a little steam. So I thought I’d share the latest crop (or crock, if you will) of inappropriate missives.

This first one is a little different. It actually starts out okay… but then shows how quickly these things can go so far sideways it makes your head spin. It’s from Spanking Tube, which I’m not on that often, but every now and then I get a notice of a friend request or message. This guy sent one message, asking if I’d ever be interested in sessioning with him, and could we have an online dialogue. Sure, what the hell, I said okay, let’s talk.

His second message (mind you, I didn’t even know his name yet) began as follows:

If you really wanted to get together for an on or off camera spanking session I do offer room accommodations as well as some spending money as a reward for your cooperation with the session. I know meeting up with a big 6 foot 4 man with muscles like me can be intimidating for you. So if you wanted to build some trust beforehand that is great. But was thinking we could arrange something based on what you want as well.

Sounds okay so far, right? Yeah. Read on.

Like if you are alright with having your rectum spread wide open with inspection gloves for rectal thermometer readings / enemas, receiving seated hand strappings with a large heavy duty rough leather strap, etc. I am quite stern when in a session and can really command authority with an authoritative voice and no nonsense style of dishing out pure discipline.

blinking Um… what’s that now?

Talk about 0 to 360. Ye gods. Is it just me, or is that a mighty big assumption, figuring a session would naturally segue from a simple spanking into… all that? Mind you, I know some people would enjoy it. However, introducing major anal at the gate before you’ve even told a woman your name is… disconcerting, to say the least. No, thank you. I like the stern bit and the authoritative voice (although “command authority with an authoritative voice” is redundant), but leave my rectum out of it, please.

Back to the usual dreck:

I love the blood and scars on your beaten ass …You’re so pretty …I want to fuck you up and hurt you

The what on my what? Okay, clearly this wasn’t intended for me. I may very well have hundreds of pictures out there, but there isn’t a single one with blood and scars. It’s not my play style. Soooo… NO. Thanks for saying I’m pretty, but no.

 I love to spank a nice ass then eat it and finish with a robust fucking. <Smile>

You want a side of fava beans with that? You are not eating any part of me, sorry.

Nothing like reddening a sweet looking ass and spreading it wide to slide into. Lol

(sigh) Are you sensing a theme here? And oh, did I mention that the above two entries came with, uh, illustrations? Yup. As if I needed a picture drawn, both had graphic depictions of the described activity. Good grief.

From a complete stranger:

You are long overdue a long spanking … you are fiesty and unruly and playful and need to be manhandled… over my knee… your panties yanked down and your arms firmly pushed into the small of your back and spanked hard.. long and hard. and I will feel you up to see how wet you get.

Oh, you will, huh? Presumptuous much? By the way, you might want to rephrase this, cookie. It reads like you want to spank my arms. And FFS, learn how to spell fEIsty.

And finally, this one isn’t just obnoxious, it also seems to be a victim of Autocorrect.

Love a sassy little b**** the lights are ass reddened before she gets f*****

The asterisks are not mine, BTW; this is exactly how it was typed. So… HUH?? Took me a minute, but I figured “the lights are” was intended to read “that likes her.” At least that would make sense. Still rude, though.

The fun never stops, does it. I am so ready to kiss this week goodbye. Thanks for helping me laugh at this nonsense! Have a great weekend, y’all. Be safe. ♥

Correspondence Hall of Shame, 4/23

What, did you think I’d croaked or something? Nah. I just didn’t have anything new to post, other than the broken record about waiting for vaccines and wanting to play and so on, and I know that was tiresome, so I decided to be quiet until I actually had something else to say. And in the meantime, of course, the pervos weren’t quiet, so here’s a new selection for you.

I.would warm those bare booty cheeks up.real.good with the.belt.and after I would definitely cuddle u n my arms and kiss u why I’m softly rubbing and caressing all over that bare booty

You would, huh? Would you also explain all those random periods?

YOUR NEW MASTER AND KING Ok Great If your Real and looking for a relationship Lets talk OK This is DADDY Xxxxxx from Xxxx Xxxxx Ca. Contact me at xxxxxxxxxxx@yahoo.com and give me all your info with pic and when can we meet this week for real

Make up your damn mind — are you master, king, or daddy? Never mind, I don’t want any of those. Yes, I’m real. Unfortunately, I’m afraid you are too. No, thanks.

I am only looking for my all-in-one-slave: my partner, my love, my best friend, my whore, my bitch, my slut, my slave , i am an extraorthinary master, because both worlds will be work together. Most of my life will be shared – only a few things will need time. But i am a touchy person and also very body focused – also when we will know you are my girl

She’s a partner! She’s a love! She’s a best friend! She’s a whore! She’s a bitch! She’s a slut! She’s a slave! She crawls on her belly like a reptile… oh, wait, wrong song. To find such a woman would truly be extraorthinary. Sadly, I am not that woman. Move along.

You seek very hard use and long term slavery? How masochistic are you? You very obedient?

No. Not. No.

My subjects end up with a darkee color as Im I’m applying a lot more speed and impact force to it. Not to brag about but several of my subjects pee without them knowing.

Your subjects? Are we talking about this “king” shit again? And… um… can someone please explain to me how making someone pee without their knowing it (and really, how the @#$% is this possible) is something to brag about?? If I were ever OTK and peed on a man, I think I’d commit suicide from sheer mortification.

And finally, this isn’t really a CHoS entry; it’s not rude or obnoxious, but it made me giggle. It was a friend request on FetLife.

Him: Hi, Erika. I’m @xxxxxxxxxxxxx on Twitter. We’ve been friends for years. ………. Hello!!! *big virtual hugs*
Me: Hello! Soooo… we’ve been friends for years, but you don’t know how to spell my name? 😉
Him: Oops
.

I accepted his friend request. It’s all good.

So, what’s been going on? Mostly work and dealing with the wait for vaccines. At the beginning of the month, I finally became eligible, so I made an appointment immediately and got my first Moderna vaccine on April 5. John got his a few days prior. I will be getting my second one on Monday, May 3.

And on Monday, May 17, I have a play date. First time I’ll be playing since February 2020.

My friend in Oregon has been keeping up regular correspondence with me this whole time, and never wavered in his desire to come visit me when it became safe. He will be driving, so no Covid exposure. He’s fully vaccinated. And I am fully confident that I’ll be in great hands. I have not seen him for several years, but I have fond party memories of him, and emailing with him has been very enjoyable.

When we made our plan earlier this week, this was part of his email correspondence. No shame here…

Nice slow warmup until you are glowing an all-over red.
Then a good, long, hard hand spanking.
We will see how you are doing, and then bring out the strap or leather paddle.
Once I have you wiggling nicely, we can move to the hairbrush and we can push just a bit.
Mmmm…I am soooooo looking forward to that!

Oh, good Christ… me too. fanning self furiously

The pandemic is far from over, but I believe we’re turning a corner. I think the wait and caution will be well worth it. Both John and I managed to escape this damn thing and we’re still being extra careful. My gym reopened, but I put a freeze on my membership for six months. I’ve worked out at home for over a year now and I don’t feel the need to go back when they’re only operating at 10% capacity and there’s a million regulations and restrictions. And even though restaurants are back up for eat-in business, we’re still getting takeout.

I mean, let’s get real here. I love some individuals with all my heart, but people on the whole? I’m in no rush to rejoin society. As I said in a tweet a while back: I can’t wait to get my vaccines. Then I can stop avoiding people because of Covid, and go back to avoiding them because they annoy the fuck out of me.

Have a great weekend, y’all. Stay safe.

Correspondence Hall of Shame, 2/5

First CHoS of 2021, and it’s a special one. Most often I do a collection of these, but every now and then, I get a single one that is so outrageous, it merits its own column. Today’s entry is one of those.

To refresh your memories, one of my peeviest peeves is The Form Letter. You know the kind I mean; the ones that are so clearly sent to multiple women, probably at random, just to see if anyone takes the bait. They’re overly long, way too detailed, and completely impersonal. Usually what the guy is talking about has nothing to do with what I seek.

Last week, I got one of those. As far as the writing goes, aside from a few typos, it’s not the usual misspelled gobbledy-gook. But wait till you read it. It’s mind-boggling.

I only contact the slave that I am seriously interested in. And I am very, very interested in you.

I am exceptional, direct, and decisive. I used to be good enough and never take a position. Now, in life and everywhere, I dwell in the ultimate. Private homes, yachts, aircraft, vacations, parties are the fruit of the exceptional. And as the exceptional does, I am always on great adventures that is only made possible by living life with NO Limits.

By definition the ultimate has No Limits. Limits are for the masses and fake masters, not the Masters of the Universe.

By the way, speaking of limits, those with planes and yachts live in the entire world with no limits, hence living life to the fullest, while those without live in their box (apartment) and waste their lives. Yes, having multiple homes “going home” and “safer at home” means travel and freedom. And yes, yachts and planes are homes.

You want a master with No Limits. And a master with no limits with life, must have no limits with you. A slave must be a Master’s great possession.

I seek my permanent slave to match. Sexually, physically, domestically, loyalty, and to sacrifice all unconditionally and with 100% NO Limits. TPE Total Power Exchange and Total Slavery.

Most slaves, even before 2020, waste their lives. Live a rut, partial existence in a coma. Most masters as fake. Most Masters truly are not the master of even their own lives. Screaming masters at night and employee slaves by day, weighing limited options caused by limited finances and limited time that persists through their lives enslaving them, directly due to their lack of vision of abundance and life of No Limits. And now, with closures and the online future here, most masters are “masters” of their apartment, not their balcony, as long as they are quiet as a mouse, follow the government, apartment complex, noise and behavior rules. Yes, they are masters of the universe in the hallucinations of their mind, as they age away in their monthly rented apartment box. OMG.

Issues, age, looks, absolutely takes a back seat to attitude and 100% unlimited unconditional loyalty and self-sacrifice. With the right attitude anything can be overcome and I always overcome everything.

I am driven to live the Ultimate Life. The ultimate of anything is Unlimited with No Limits. Only an idiot would consciously choose a wasted rut life in a coma as most do.

1) Read my profile
2) Look over my albums and pics
3) Tell me if you have the right attitude
4) What is your name and cell # to talk to move forward?

Holy crap.

Well, first, because I’m a non-paying member, I can’t read his damn profile, nor can I look at his pictures. However, I can see how many he has. Most guys on Alt, if they have a picture at all, have one or two, maybe three. At the most, a half dozen. This guy has twenty-four.

Second… Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat? Really? Am I supposed to believe this is real? Is any woman out there stupid enough to buy any of this?

I get fantasy, truly I do. But reality is always firmly in the picture. Real life has limits. Life has responsibilities. So, I’m seeing one of two scenarios here. Either this guy is a rich trust fund baby who’s never had to work a day in his life and thinks he can buy someone, or he actually lives in one of those “boxes” he bangs on and on about and he’s completely full of it.

Every time I reread this thing, I notice something else. My favorite part? The last sentence: “What is your name?” There it is, solid proof that he doesn’t bother reading profiles, that he just sends this out at random. My name is right there; it is my profile name. Crystal clear.

How sad to go through life so completely pickled in contempt for mere mortals and how we live. Can you imagine how someone with this level of arrogance and superiority would actually treat a woman?

I almost never answer any of these, as you know. But this time, I couldn’t resist. So I send back one word. “Seriously???” And attached this picture.

I didn’t expect to get an answer. But two days later, he replied. “Yes, seriously. 100%”

Wow. Okay. I’m done. Carry on, Your Majesty. And good luck to you.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to sit here in my coma until tomorrow, when I go to visit my boring and mundane beloved who owns only two residences, no planes, no yachts. I can live with that, though. I get seasick. And overinflated egos tend to nauseate me as well.

Have a good weekend, y’all. Be safe.

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