Erica Scott: Life, Love and Spanking

Ruminations, opinionated observations, darkly humorous blathering and the occasional rant from an outspoken spanko and unapologetic attention wh–, um, hog.

Archive for the category “CHoS”

And so it goes

Hello, everyone. Sorry for the absence.

After much thought, going back and forth, changing my mind and then back again, I have decided it’s time to bring this blog to an end.

I have been in the spanking scene for twenty-one years this month, and online for nineteen. I have watched many changes in what became known as social media. In the early days for spanking chat and exploration, there were what was known as newsgroups, and various chat rooms. Often the latter devolved into a bunch of silly cyber spanking, but one could find intelligent conversation if one looked carefully. Then, around 2000, give or take a year, those gave way to chat forums, such as those on MSN and Yahoo, the old Shadow Lane chat board, etc. People posted and chatted and shared and connected. I co-managed a successful forum for a few years and had a blast.

When the forums began to run their course, they were overtaken by a new phenomenon: the spanking blog. Soon, everyone and their second cousin twice removed was blogging. I joined this bandwagon in 2005, on what used to be the hopping place (!): MySpace. My blog there straggled along for a while, trying to find its audience, but there was so much competition. But then two things happened. One, I was listed by our blog queen, Bonnie, who made a point of spotlighting new blogs in her “In With the New” column. Things really picked up for me after that, but I still had a second holy grail to achieve. The buzz in the blogosphere was about a gentleman who went by the name of Chross, who had a weekly list of what he considered the most notable blog posts. If one was lucky enough to be “Chrossed,” they would be treated to a highly gratifying spike in blog hits. But how did one get on Chross’s radar, I wondered? I finally grew so frustrated that I wrote a post called “Who Do I Have to @#$% to Get on Chross’s List?” Apparently, that got his attention. 🙂

After that, wow. Views, comments, etc. skyrocketed. Until MySpace died, and I took the plunge and started a new blog on Blogger in 2010. I flourished there for years, getting Chrossed often, sharing adventures and party stories and photos and scenes and video shoots, as well as bits and pieces of my personal life. When Blogger threatened to censor or shut down all their “adult” blogs, I migrated to WordPress. Turns out it wasn’t necessary, since Blogger backed off, but I don’t regret it.

However, things changed yet again. Slowly but surely, the spanking blog was overtaken by the Tumblr blogs: pictures. Lots and lots and lots of pictures. The lengthy blog entry morphed into quickie sound bites, gifs and jpegs. Comments became likes and reposts. The spanking models, who all used to blog, now opened Tumblr accounts. Twitter came to be, and now, instead of writing party and shoot reports, people tweeted the action as it was happening. There were some exceptions who maintained their popularity (Hermione and Ronnie come to mind, as well as some of the DD/Hoh blogs and some author blogs) but it seemed that overall, the traditional written spanking blog had gone the way of the VCR and the variety show.

Even so, I figured as long as I had stories to tell, experiences to share, connections to make, I’d have an audience. For quite a while, my views remained high thanks to being Chrossed often. But now, it seems even our beloved Chross has given up the ghost. And the annual Spanking Blogg Awards, put together by John Osborne of Triple A, finally eliminated the Best Creative Blogger category last year because it wasn’t getting any nominations. I was lucky enough to win second place in 2015, that award’s final year.


After many years and thousand of words, kids, I’m fresh out of things to say. On topic, anyway. I don’t want to hash and rehash the same discussions; there’s FetLife for that. Scene-wise, things have changed for me. I no longer have a top, and I haven’t played since 50 Freaks in February. I go to two parties a year. I do not shoot anymore, and even if someone were to offer it up, I’m not sure I would do it. I don’t enjoy looking at myself on film anymore — those HD cameras are not kind! And as for my personal life, I have been dealing with a great deal of grief and challenges over the past few months, including an ongoing situation with John that is stressful and scary. But you know, I don’t want to go into that on here anymore either. I have ranted, raved, wept, opened up and laid myself bare (physically and emotionally) in these posts over the years. I think it’s time for that to end. Everyone has problems; they don’t want to hear mine. And if I can’t post on-topic fun stuff, there’s really no point in continuing.

Also, I made the mistake, in a time of weakness, of writing political posts on here. Please. Can we all agree that there’s enough of that shit out there everywhere you look? I mean, really — using a spanking blog, of all things, to push one’s political agenda is arrogant, self-serving and a big waste of time, don’t you think? So I do apologize for that bit of foolishness.

I am not taking this blog down. I want to preserve it, because I’m proud of it. I would like people to be able to refer back to it, reread posts they liked, enjoy the pictures, etc. My life, my heart and my soul are in these pages. So it will remain intact, even though I won’t be adding to it any longer. I will always be grateful for my readers, all the comments, all the feedback. Without you guys, we writers might as well be talking to ourselves. And hey, I even appreciate those hapless dumbasses who gave me so much wonderful CHoS fodder. One more for the road? Sure, why not…

Hi I would like to spanking you hardly but it is turning me on and in the end which will be not short time I would like to have sex or atleast blowjob becouse I don’t want go away horny and I don’t want jerkoffing if you are okay with that or you have some other way to make e come and relax after when I spanking you hard and long tell me

(sigh) Some things never change, I guess. I suggest you come the way you always do — in your mama’s basement in front of your sticky keyboard. And for the last time, fuck off.

I don’t get as much of this nonsense nowadays, but I still see it. Recently, Alex got a critique on her Tumblr that she is neglecting to post pictures of her anus. She’s nicer than I am: I would have replied that if this person wants to see an asshole, they should look in a mirror.

Some of you have my antiquated (but still functional) AOL address. My gmail address is at the end of the About Me section here. I’m still out there, on Facebook, Twitter and FetLife. I have always welcomed polite and civil correspondence (and no, you do not have to agree with me, just don’t be a dick about it), and that will not change.

So what should be my last gasp? Perhaps I’ll just say screw it and reveal all… my real name, my family, the TV shows they worked on…

wait for it…



Come on, you didn’t really think I’d tell all that, did ya? Besides, I wanted to go out on a Big Bang. 😛

And so this hard-edged, tender-hearted, snarky spanko bids you farewell, in this venue at least. Have a great life, y’all. ♥ ♥ ♥  Thank you for reading.

Correspondence Hall of Shame, End of Year Edition, and more

Greetings, readers. As this will be my last post of 2016, I thought I’d present a hodgepodge of treats for you. So grab a beverage of your choice, whack off a chunk of that stale fruitcake with a hacksaw, and settle in.

First up, a few CHoS entries:

I swear this sounds lile so fucking fun and a turn on
Lolol love it when a women love other thing beside sex 
You do have a sexy ass that should always be SMACK!! Good when that se,y booty is out

Uh… what? I’m sorry, I’m not bilingual; I don’t speak Moronese.

hi cutie, my name is Xxx and we have the same sexual interests.. I enjoy passionate kissing, foreplay, oral sex, anal sex, FWB, LTR, BDSM, role playing and doing anything to please you. I would love to explore every inch of your body with my hands and tongue. I like hard and fast sex, but prefer marathon all night sex.. I may be older than what you are looking for, but age is just a number and PLEASURE, weather it comes from yourself, someone younger, or older, is still PLEASURE. I am always horny and available. If this is what you are looking for, check my profile to see if we match and message me back

I don’t know whose profile you were reading, but it wasn’t mine, since mine said I wasn’t seeking sex. Yes, age is just a number, and so is IQ. Yours, apparently, is in the double digits.

You may have seen this comment before, since it was left right here on this blog. I thought it deserves its own special message. What a shame this person thinks they’re so clever.

I bet you only get spanked on the left side of your ass

Wrong again, Breitbart Breath, as is evidenced by this recent photo:


And finally, to my special hater out there: Really? You think my last blog was all about little ol’ you? Tsk… now who’s vain, hmmm? My upbringing in the “entertainment world” had nothing to do with my political views — I am a well-educated woman and I have a mind of my own — so you may can the condescending claptrap. But hey, thanks for saying I have a pretty face. I do believe that’s the first time in all these years that you’ve ever said anything nice about me. 🙂

Interesting side note: Someone very close to me — who is a conservative and voted for Trump — read my last blog. He could have been pissy about it, but all he had to say about it was that it’s a funny and satirical piece, and some of the best writing he’s seen from me. How about that. I thanked him for his civility, and he said, “I’m the norm. The people who act like a-holes are the exception.” I’m afraid I disagree with that; I think it’s the other way around. But we’ll see.

Moving on — did you guys miss my annual sniping about fruitcake? Then this is for you. Our ever-trendy coffeehouse, Starbucks, unveiled a Christmas treat this year, available for one week only: the Fruitcake Frappuccino. It was described as a blended iced coffee drink with hazelnut and cinnamon, topped by whipped cream, caramel and matcha (whatever the @#$% that is). What’s fruitcake-y about this, you might ask? Well, also blended into the beverage are bits of dried fruit. That’s right, so you can eat your Frappuccino as well as drink it. It’s creamy! It’s chunky! It’s chewy! It’s disgusting!

And if you’re not already sick, here is a real view of it:


I’m sorry, but this doesn’t resemble anything drinkable to me. It looks like the inside of a Times Square toilet on New Year’s Eve.

Did everyone have a nice holiday? Mine had some pleasant moments, although I was struggling a bit. Earlier this month, Alex and Paul had a lovely little party, and I did my best to get into the spirit, dressing myself up, complete with black stockings that had red bows at the top, red pumps, and a black shirt that had “Naughty” on the front and “Nice” on the back. Last week, Alex, SC and I had a long-overdue girls’ night out, where we chatted for hours and exchanged presents. I got some nice things, including a beautiful, soft and plush robe from Alex, and SC gave me a Lego set… to build the Yellow Submarine! I haven’t played with Legos since I was a kid; this should be fun. But I think my favorite gift was one that came as a surprise in the mail: it was from Lily Starr, and when I opened it, I smiled, then giggled, then guffawed. It was a crystal pendant… of a snowflake.

I think this might have been the beginning of a turnaround for me. I felt my humor, long dormant, kick back in a bit. And my feistiness. Damn right I’m a snowflake, and I’ll accept that term, meant to be insulting, with pride. In fact, Lily’s gift inspired me to shoot this little video. 🙂 Screw with me, and I’m screwing right back. I may go down in a nuclear holocaust in the coming year or so, but I’m going down laughing.

* * *

Now, if I can be serious for a moment. This has been a brutal year. No, not just because of the obvious, but for so many other miseries befalling people I care about. Job losses, illnesses, broken relationships, getting outed. Deaths… so many deaths. John lost his own closest friend last month, and we are still reeling from that. And this was a terrible year for our beloved icons, with an unbelievable count of losses. Actors. Musicians. Authors. Sports figures. Astronauts. Just this week, we lost Carrie Fisher and Debbie Reynolds, one day apart. Reportedly, Ms. Reynolds’ last words were “I want to be with Carrie” before she had a massive stroke. I guess it is possible to die of a broken heart. My own heart breaks for Todd Fisher, who lost both his sister and mother within 24 hours, and for Billie Lourd, who lost her mother and grandmother. Sometimes life is very cruel.

If you have never seen Singin’ In The Rain, I am telling you to do so. Even if you say you don’t like musicals, see it anyway. It is so much more than song and dance, although those numbers are dazzling, and it’s impressive to watch a 19-year-old Debbie Reynolds, who’d never danced professionally before, holding her own with two of the best dancers of the 20th century. It’s funny, clever, energetic, romantic, and if it doesn’t put a smile on your face and lift your spirits, you might want to check for a pulse.

What’s my point? Life is short. Hold your loved ones close. Hang in there, and do the best you can. I say this as much to myself as I do to my friends. I’m going to put on my rain gear and boots, and plow bravely forward into the crapstorm that 2017 is looking to be, determined to have fun and experience love and joy where I can. May you all do the same.

Have a great weekend, y’all. ♥

Correspondence Hall of Shame, 6/3

Ready for some Friday laughs, kids? Here you go.

I wanna soank that fat ass.

Fat?? Ouch. This is from an 18-year-old, by the way. I truly could be his grandmother. Tell you what, son. Come back when you’ve learned how to spell what you want to do to me. Oh, and when you’re shaving.

Do you have dark fantasies about being USED. Are you the paradox between your innocent (vanilla) and feminine professional (woman) image and this erotic dark side to be objectified and used like a “dirty girl”. No one knows nor would you draw any suspicions. The Stepford wife image; uppity, prudish and snobby with that mysterious look (making them wonder…..what is below the surface). Very masochistic??

Uh… yeah, sure, that’s me. I’m so prim and proper, baking pies in my pencil skirt and pearls. I guess I must be very masochistic, though, considering I subject myself to crap like this.

wow hun i would spank that bottom and then lick it and in the crack 

Wow, hun, I hope you don’t kiss your blow-up doll with that mouth.

Experienced in the scene and an actual professional dog trainer who uses techniques on my previous subs. Would like to learn more about you my dear.

You would, huh? OK, here’s the first thing you should know: I’m not a @#$%ing dog!! I hope one of your subs pees on your leg.

And finally… this is a first. In all the years I’ve been online and getting all these missives, I’ve never received anything like this.

Jesus Christ died on the Cross for your sins. Repent and believe in the Gospel today!
One day you will stand before God and you will give account for everything you have done! 
Sex outside of marriage, oral sex, homosexuality, transgender, lesbianism, lust (all sexual sin) will send you to hell! Mercy and grace is offered to you today through Jesus Christ. Please take it! 
Hell is a place of torment, a place of isolation, darkness and eternal fire forever and ever. 
God does not want you to go there. God made a way for you to be forgiven and have mercy through His Son Jesus Christ. 
He wants you to surrender your heart today and believe in your heart that Jesus is Lord. 
The Bible says that ‘Today is the Day of Salvation’ that you are not guaranteed to live another day. 
Jesus commands all men and women to “Repent and believe in the Gospel” Mark 1:15. 
God wants you in heaven not hell. Think about it. 
What will you do with Jesus Christ today? He wants to save you. 
Will you humble yourself and ask Jesus into your heart right now?
“For God so loved the world(you) that He gave His one and only Son (Jesus) that whosoever believes in Him (Jesus) shall not perish (in Hell) but have everlasting life (heaven). John 3:16
Invite Jesus into your heart today and ask Him to become your personal Lord and Savior! It’s that simple. 

Pardon the blasphemy, but Oh My Fucking God.

Thank you for your concern, my friend, but you’re too late. I’ve been hellbound for years. Considering all my friends and loved ones will be there too, I’m actually kinda looking forward to it.

This was on The sender had a blank profile, no pictures, no descriptions, nothing. Some people think he/she has a “repent” fetish and this is part of how their kink manifests. I’m skeptical. I think it’s a random holy roller going onto kink sites and trying to save souls. What do you think?

Anyway… what with my newfound meme infatuation, of course I had to create one for my CHoS contributors:


Have a great weekend, y’all.

Correspondence Hall of Shame, 2/5

Yes, kids, it’s that time again! Didn’t think I’d be able to sneak this in today as I was busy with work, but I finished in time and have some to spare before I head to John’s. So, enjoy.

dear bottom,
i would love to spank your bottom until it is very red and you are soaking wet. i have a collection of tools and a bondage bench for women just like you. I can introduce you to some very kinky bottom play.

You know, I do have a name. But let’s overlook that for a moment. What I can’t overlook is that you call yourself “Doctor Enema.” No, thanks.

Hi wats up bb wanna have fun

Big surprise, I ignored this one. And then the next day, same guy:

Hi sexxy I love to spank some ass n then I will licked n fucked rough

N then I deleted this one too.

The next one falls under the “Did you even read my profile?” subhead:

hi, I’m xxxx,
I am seeking a slave to serve and please my Dom. i have fallen ill & can not serve as i used too. if you ever had this fantasy of serving as a slave and being used for a man’s pleasure, or if you have served before. then please take a look at our profile. My Sir is is a well known Fetish Photographer, that is why we have a playroom/dungeon. Sir has a huge cock (tho he’ll deny it) which he loves to use on moaners or screamers, he loves anal (which he does really really well). lol we are just trying to find sluts willing to have him take you as many times he pleases, who won’t ever say no to his cock, & who are clean. 

I’m so sorry. But I’m afraid that after reading this crap, I have fallen ill as well. Perhaps he can photograph my ass as I walk away.

And finally, this one was extra special. First, the message:

i’m xxxxx
i luv 2 spank u with my bare hand
i understand u hav a regular playmate, but i’d luv 2 paddle ur fanny. 
Ha! i didn’t say ass–lol.
I’m obsessed with boobs, I still think fart’n is funny, and my funniest humor is naughty/inappropriate. Do you think you can handle me?
talk 2 me

And then, his profile description:

An easy-going, educated, conservative, patriotic, God-fearing Dominant Veteran
in search of a sexy, low-maintenance, easy-going, conservative, patriotic, God-fearing (no muslims or athiests. agnostics ok) sub. 

How many things can be wrong with one correspondence? (I won’t even go into the picture he had on his profile — shudder.) And if he’s so educated, why does his message make a texting teenager look like a rocket scientist?

Let’s review, shall we, Mr. ‘Murica? I’m not a sub, I don’t have enough boobage for you to obsess over, I’m hardly easy-going. Oh, and did I mention that I’m indeed an atheist (and I know how to spell it correctly), I’m pro-choice, and I voted for Obama? Twice? No Muslims, huh? How do you feel about Jews? Nah, probably don’t like them much either.

You may not have said ass, but you certainly are one. Go wave your flag somewhere else.

Ah, I feel a little better now. I’m a bit grumpy today, having found out that my @#$%ing dental insurance does not cover root canals after all, and I have to pay for the one I had in December in full. What the hell? What kind of dental insurance doesn’t have any coverage, at least in part, for a root canal? Arrrgh. Oh well. Guess I need to switch providers, which is always a hoot and a holler. Never mind, life goes on, and I’m off to see my sweetheart.

Have a great weekend, y’all. 🙂

Correspondence Hall of Shame, 6/12


Been a while, hasn’t it? I’ve saved up some terrifically terrible tidbits for you.

Short and stupid:

Hi beautiful 🙂 would love tto strap u to bed an sspank your sweet ass til it red

Did I get you excited, darlin’? You’re stuttering.

WARNING: Grossness alert. The following entry is especially revolting. Read at your lunch’s peril.

Male here with a massive pussy eating fetish. I love to eat it dirty, smelly, hairy (prefer it hairy), unwashed/wiped for days, “creampies”, and I also love eating on the period (no tampon in). I also love it pissy and for a female to piss as I am eating her out. Not looking for sex really, I can get off from eating pussy, but only if its dirty/smelly or that time of the month.

Uh… move on, pal. First, I don’t have “that time of the month” anymore. Second, unwashed/unwiped for days?? Where are we, on a remote desert island? I’m far too clean for you. Oh, and you like it really hairy? Feel free to time travel back into the 1970s.

(excuse me while I take a quick break for a shower)

Hello I work in Xxxxxx we could spank I could spank you and you could fist me in exchange ? Just a straight forward arrangement . Let me know

Sure, I’ll fist you. Gimme your face.

OK, kids, interpretation time:

Hello beautiful angel of heaven wanted to see you wanted quitame Virgo’m looking for someone to teach me more than good

WTF is “quitame,” and why would I want it? Oh, and honey, I don’t teach good. I teach bad. 🙂 Angel of heaven? Clearly you took a wrong turn somewhere.

And finally, a real head-scratcher; a new take on the form letter  This was much longer, but I cut out the portions with personal information.

The Kid Crowned King Öcean Am a Beat composer & a performer

My Life is a Way of Art & Patterns.
Am easy Able To Do FEATURES or HOOKS*
i Would Love To Take You Out For a Classy Romantic Dinner After Or Before a Healty Fun Catwalk Through The Mall

Whateva You Like Whatever You Want
That’s All For Now -)
The Kid♔★♪
#Crowned King Öcean♔★♪
#Dedicated/Devoted Artist♔

Say it with me… HUH?? Dear King Ocean: Methinks you’ve inhaled a bit too much saltwater.

As for this crown icon, it sorta looks to me like a bifurcated light bulb, or a butt with the cheeks pulled apart and a plug inserted. Go on, try to unsee it.

In other Friday news, John has now been back to work for two weeks. He is very tired, but seems to be hanging in there. His spirits are good. He has been too tired to take his walks, but we’re hoping his energy will come back. As for me, all the plumbing/plastering/drilling/etc. is finished in my apartment, as of this morning. There’s still a lot of work that needs to be done on the pipes overall throughout the building, but the ones in my immediate vicinity are fixed. No more noise, no more invasion. Yesterday, I got away from it all and spent the day with Alex, and we caught each other up for over six hours. It did us both good, I think. Friends are wonderful things. ♥

Have a great weekend, y’all.

Correspondence Hall of Shame, 3/16

Happy Friday, everyone. And how timely that I have one of these columns today. I am in one of my “too-many-people-are-too-fucking-stupid-and-I-need-to-move-to-another-planet” moods. So now I can release some of my aggression in a fairly innocuous manner.

We begin with this drivel, which has been sent to me four times, no less:

FORMER ROCK STAR Not really a rock superstar , but worked with some great groups including “Alice Cooper” and “Earth , Wind and Fire” , I was a great “jouneyman” musician , not a great songwriter , and a quality , but not unique voice. As with most musicans , incredible sexual adventures , which brought me to this world.. Now , a successful film/tv agent. A different approach..hopefully , successful. This site , and all “meeting sites” are difficult , in very different ways , for men and women. You get massive hits and emails , and men get limited responses. Perhaps my candor will work. This is all absolutely true. I’m 59…attractive , work out daily , in good shape (not a hunk , but when naked , in front of the mirror…I’m happy). Dominant , and when being that , a great Dom. In the past few years , I have “switched” and do find it interesting , but , no less the “Dom”. A simple proposal. Drinks or dinner. If nothing else , some great , intelligent conversation. Perhaps about this world , or life , or love. My profile is all true…and I promise you’ll find me charming , respectful , and fun…Sincere Thanks

Ooooooh! Earth, Wind and Fire! I can feel my panties dampening already!

First, you say you’re 59 but your profile says you’re 62. Second, you use way too damn many commas and a space before each of them is unnecessary. And third, ever wonder exactly why you get limited responses. Give that a think next time you’re standing in front of the mirror naked. (brain bleach, please)

I am interested in gentle dildo training.

I should think you are. Because one should never train one’s dildo harshly.

hello do you enjoy face sitting if so would you like to turn myface into your set and sit onit as long as you like or wear my face like its your panties

Ye gods. You attached your picture; I’ve seen your face. I don’t want to sit on it, wear it or ever see it again.

Haven’t gotten one of these for a while — a form letter:

First let ME clarify that Ww/e have the time and resources to travel and be where we want when we want. We can travel nationally if we feel the person warrants it. Seriously searching we have the time to make the effort to meet truly serious people. PICS ON PROFILE.

Secondly, we can devote large amounts of time to training, play and lifestyle travel with you. If you are inexperienced, brand new, or live a distance, it is not a problem. We travel to you, if need be and in those cases where it has worked well we have you travel with us on kinky holidays, trips and to lifestyle resorts. If you are new you will be safe, learn at your own pace and be shown all that you need to know to be active in a safe way. For the more experienced we look for a different experience of intense edge play and intense scenes and complex play with larger equipment and scenes such as abduction, interrogation, play rape, forced use and humiliation.

Intense and commanding, educated and worldly, a skilled teacher, We seek primarly a fem sub/slave or couple to pursue the joys and pleasures of bdsm and the erotic arts. Both are fit, attractive, very creative, kinky, sexually on fire, and bring a very firm hand to training and discipline, but open and clear in our desires and wants. I have a great deal of experience, am very visual, a leather lover, enjoy complex “scenes”, and expert with MY tools and toys. We are a long term lifestyle Dom/sub couple and will take you sexually and mentally where you have not gone before.

We believe in safe, sane and have a strong need to dominate and use you in endless ways. I have done MY “homework” and know the power of the mind, understand submission and know well the role of a Master in the care and development of the submissive/slave mind. It’s not just about kinky sex, but about the blend of sex, control, submission and emotional need. The best have it in their DNA. She is bisexual, skilled and polished in the art of slavery and submission.

We have a full life being a successful professionals, direct and honest, passionate about life and living to the fullest. I am lean, passionate, strong hands and sexually insatiable using the body and mind for intense mind fucks. She is multi orgasmic, long legged and a lean blonde slut. I have trained and owned slaves in the past and am a skilled and patient teacher of “newbies” as well as those who are seasoned.

I enjoy, practice and excel at many fetishes including long sessions of bdsm, rope play, anal play, electric, rope and whip and flogger and a wide range of mental fetish play, sexual D/s, and adult exploration. I push boundaries including edge play, but take you there safely and back. I am active in the San Diego and LA bdsm communities, frequent the dungeons and private play parties and discreet meets and socials.

What a pity that I wasted my time reading all of this, when you so clearly didn’t read a word of my profile.

I could go into all the reasons why what you’ve written to me is so, so inappropriate, but I don’t have all weekend. Oh, and I prefer to call myself “experienced.” Saying I’m “seasoned” makes it sound like I have 11 secret herbs and spices on my ass.

And the Gem of the Week goes to:

Hi, I know what u mean,not a sub you think like I r a bottom–great one also—I have the scene. I know what u want, I was in LEATHER ROSE Chi. many yrs. ago–know just how to please a Bottom, like u….I love your honesty! put the bozos in their place, My b day is Mar.17th. St. PADDLE. me day,ha ha,I d give u u my spanks,mmmmmm now back to u young lady,If i had u otk, i would take u (flying)—term 4 when you get soooo excited u get dizzy and shake as u orgasm.–not being crude just hot-wet moist. My uncle “tanned”my 16yr.old cousin 2-3x a week,that started my SPANKING career. got a chubby and loved to spank since then. You must have gotten hot when some one paddled u otk how old were u, first spanking???tets chat—lost my lil bottom 4yrs ago. play safe —lets talk…a friend??I lived in Yuca Valley yrs ago take care

My dear fellow, I had many reactions to this, but “hot-wet moist” wasn’t one of them. Put the bozos in their place, huh? Okie dokie. **plunk** And no, I didn’t put you in the Recycle bin, either.

Why am I in a foul mood? Meh. Doesn’t matter. Lots of little irritants. At least I get to escape to John’s for a couple of days. And it’s going to rain all weekend, which cheers me up. Yes, I know that’s weird. What else is new.

So have a great weekend, y’all. Happy St. Paddy’s Day. Wearing green = good. Drinking until you’re green = notsomuch.

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