Dear Ageism: You can GFY

Can we all agree that Halle Berry is one of the most stunningly beautiful women on the planet? The other day, she posted this gorgeous and tastefully sexy picture on Twitter. She is 56 years old.

Kudos to her. And then some asshole retweeted the picture and wrote this:

Imagine being in your 50s and still posting nudes for attention in menopause when you should be chilling with the grandkids. Aging with dignity is no longer a thing.

Oh. My. God.

This cretin was actually age/body shaming Halle Freaking Berry?? I saw red. A lot of other people did too.

Soooo… once we pass “a certain age,” all we’re good for is sitting around playing Dot to Dot with our age spots and singing “How Dry I Am”? We’re demoted from Woman to Grandma?

Well, y’all know me and how I feel on this subject, kids. I just had to make a statement. So I retweeted his tweet and wrote:

On behalf of all women in their 50s and beyond who refuse to sit in a rocker and knit socks, who think women are more than baby factories, who thumb their noses at ageing and ageism from people like you, I’ve got a special message for you.

And of course, I accompanied it with this picture:

That was yesterday, but the likes and retweets are still coming. 😀 Got some new followers too.

Put that in your Metamucil and shove it. 😛

Some words about pictures

We’re all visual creatures, aren’t we? We love our spanko pictures, videos, clips. We talk about them, we share them, we collect them, and some of us get to create our own. But if you’re like me, after seeing a ton of content for more years than I care to count, you get a little jaded. Not as easily impressed. It takes more to push my buttons these days. Especially since, being the male-top-focused woman I am, I’m looking more at the men in the shots/clips than the women.

So what’s one of my buttons, kids? Men’s hands/forearms. Bonus — rolled-up sleeves, or in the process of doing so. You wanna make me weak in the knees? Don’t send me your junk. Send me your arms.

Remember this shot I took in my own living room in 2019? Still one of my personal favorites.

What is it about button-pushing pictures? If you’re like me, they take you somewhere. They ignite fantasies and/or memories. They quicken your pulse and make you catch yourself grinning like an idiot. It had been a while since I’d had that happen.

That is, until a couple of days ago when I stumbled across this.

First, I fainted.

Then, after I scraped myself off the floor, I stared. And stared some more.

Fellow bottoms, do you agree that this is perfection? The purposeful stance. The well-worn jeans. The doubled-over belt, and his strong grip on it. Knowing that just seconds ago, he unbuckled it and whipped it out of his belt loops with a loud snap. And also knowing that the next snap you hear will be that belt across your backside.

So, kids, do tell — is it possible to fall in lust with a photograph?

Of course it is.

For those of you who have been with me for a long time, bear with me, because you’ve read about this before. For my newer people, about twelve years ago, same kind of thing happened. I ran across a public photo from a kinky video company and it stopped me in my tracks. And strangely, it had absolutely nothing to do with spanking. But it touched off the part of me that is turned on by the thought of helplessness, of being overpowered by a handsome stranger. This was the picture:

And so I wrote a post about it. I had no idea who the man was. However, someone who read my blog did… and they told him.

Turned out he was local. And he contacted me on FetLife. Cue heart attack.

Most of you remember this story. For those who don’t, the short version was we met, we played, we became friends, and we even got to shoot together. Extra awesome bonus: I got to re-enact that picture with him.

This is the sort of thing the fantasy stories are made of. And I got to live it. Damn. Sometimes it doesn’t suck being me. 😀

So, if anyone happens to know who this handsome stranger with the belt is, do feel free to send him here. Hey… a girl can dream, can’t she?

In other news, I actually got my lazy cranky butt in the car and went to a lovely munch last night. We had the entire back alley behind a pub, with outdoor heaters, and we had a nice group. Got to see some old friends, and made a couple of new ones. This is a new group, run by my friend Mr. Woodland and his adorable partner, and so far, it’s gaining in popularity. Great to see some spanking scene in L.A. again!

Crap. I have to adult now and work. How tedious. Anyway, enjoy. The line for swooning forms to the left.

So… what would you say?

There are two types of spankos who exist on Facebook: people who use their real names and keep their FB pages and posts vanilla, or people who are open about their kink and often (but not always) use a fetish-y name. I got a friend request there from a guy with a regular name, but he had spanking pictures all over his page, so I figured okay, we’re kindred spirits and I accepted the request.

I then had access to his full page and when I scanned down it, I saw this:

Jesus, Murray and Jehoshaphat — before I could ponder that, first I had to scrape myself off the floor and the walls and go take a cold shower. What is it about a handsome man in a suit?? (BTW, no, this isn’t the FB guy.) After that, just for grins, I posted the picture on both FetLife and Twitter to see what others might have to say about it.

One FetLife friend commented: “This is easy. ‘You’ll wrinkle your suit, Sir.’ ” That one cracked me up.

But then a Twitter friend reminded me about this recent post regarding my awkward incident with a top’s dress pants. So of course, now I had my own answer.

“Well, sir, you may have a very uncomfortable encounter with your dry cleaner after I spooge your slacks.”

Of course, then he’d probably still spank me and then order me to take the damn pants to the dry cleaner myself.

Which, by the way, I would do. Because there’s just something about a handsome man in a suit… wait, I already said that. Dammit.

On a completely different note, this FB guy I friended sent me a message, saying hello, thanks for accepting the friend request, and was I into spanking as well. I said yes, I was, but I tend to be very subtle about it on FB out of respect for vanilla friends.

He then replied, “Cool. Are you trans?”

Um… what?

Okay, maybe I’m out of touch. Is this a standard “getting to know you” question now?? Or was this wildly inappropriate to ask right out of the gate? I am truly baffled. It’s not the question that bothers me; it’s the timing of it. “Hi, nice to meet you, are you trans?” Jeeez.

After sitting in stunned silence for a moment, I wrote back that I am a cisgender female, and that’s a very odd question to spring on a perfect stranger. He replied that he meant no offense and then dropped the conversation. Good grief.

Sometimes, I just can’t with people.

(sigh) Have a great weekend, y’all. Be safe. ♥

I get by…

…with a little help from my friends.

Hey, that’s catchy. Someone ought to set that to music sometime.

This happened a couple of weeks ago, but due to what was going on in the country, I figured I’d postpone it for a while.

We all know the spanking scene is a mixed bag. But one of the things I’ve always loved over the years is the solidarity many of us share. We have each other’s back(sides). And sometimes, it’s not just about playful bratting or what have you. Sometimes, the subjects are serious.

About 3 1/2 years ago, a friend of mine wrote a post on FetLife. In it, she took a bold stance: she stated that she would not play with anyone who is a Trump supporter. She listed her reasons why; it was a well-written, detailed post, no name-calling, just stating her position and why.

As you can imagine, the comments flowed. Some were supportive. Some were neutral. And of course, many others were nasty. I felt like I wanted to do something to support her, so people would see she’s not alone in this stance.

So I posted this picture:

I said I was doing this in solidarity with [her name], and I made it my avatar. Aaaaand the comments rolled in. Most were supportive. But of course, some were nasty.

And then, much to my delight, the incomparable Michael Masterson posted this picture:

He captioned it with “In support of my girl Erica Scott, who has the courage to make her voice heard, I offer you this.” My comment? “I love you, Mike.”

(Sorry about the editing, but the pic was a bit too gynecological. I figured it took away from the message.)

Anyway, cut to the present. I decided it was time to dump the old avatar and put up a new picture. So I chose this one from the end of 2019 (because 2020 was sadly lacking in play).

What is it we FetLife veterans know? No matter what kind of picture you put up, some people aren’t going to like it. And some people won’t hesitate to let you know they don’t like it, and why. You’re wearing panties. You’re not wearing panties. You’re too heavy, you’re too thin, you’re too old, you’re too young, etc. etc. The picture is too graphic. The picture isn’t graphic enough. And of course, one of my favorites: if it shows the results of a spanking, you get the ‘I could have done a better job’ comments.

Sure enough, the picture wasn’t up five minutes when I got this right off the bat:

Not red or bruised enough… just saying. 😉 😉

Really?? And is the “wink, wink” supposed to make it okay?

I mean, come on. If you’re of the persuasion of preferring more graphicly walloped bottoms, you have thousands to choose from on FetLife. Knock yourself out. Go look at the pictures of butts that look like they were pounded with a meat cleaver and then thrown on a barbecue grill, and have a wank-fest. Why bother stopping to comment on mine if you don’t like it?

Sheesh. I hadn’t put up a new picture on Fet in ages, and right out of the gate, I hear from the basement critics. But I didn’t want to start a thing on FetLife, so I didn’t reply to the comment. However, I did go on Twitter and grouse about it, saying that I really wanted to answer, “Who the fuck asked you?” but I’d refrain.

Next thing I knew, my buddy Sarah (not Gregory; a different Sarah I’ve mentioned on here, she of the full-body tackle hugs at parties) tweeted to me: “Allow me… BRB.” And within a minute, I saw I had a notification on Fet of a new comment. I went to look, and nearly fell on the floor.

Below the guy’s comment, Sarah had typed:

[His name]: Who the fuck asked you? 😉 😉

But wait, there’s more: Within minutes, the guy commented back to her. I braced myself for some vitriol, figuring I’d have to step in at some point. But all he wrote was:

Good comment. 🙂

Well, how about that. I chose to interpret that as saying, “Yeahhhh, you’re right, I guess that was kind of a dumb thing to say.” No harm done. And the picture got a lot more attention after that. Sarah, you really do rock. 😀

Not that I spend much time on FetLife these days, anyway. I’m usually there to network about parties, or post about scenes I’ve had. And what with Covid, there’s been none of that. Still… it’s nice to know your friends still look out for you. ♥ I miss everyone so much. The February party has already been canceled, but we are hoping for Labor Day.

Final note: Regarding this week’s momentous occasion, I will say just one thing and then leave it alone.

Four years ago, my stepmother, then 85 and in poor health, was in complete despair over Trump’s presidency. She wrote to me: “I was born during one the country’s darkest times [the Great Depression], and I’m probably going to die during another one.” That broke my heart. I was afraid she wouldn’t stick around; that she’d get so despondent, she’d give up and stop fighting.

Yesterday, she emailed me and said, among other things, “After Biden’s speech, I broke down and sobbed like a child.” She’s now 89. But she’s still with me. She made it. She hung in there long enough to watch us all come out the other side. And I’m so very grateful. It sickened me to the core that the Honorable Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg didn’t live to see this, but damn, this sure helps soothe that pain.

That’s all, folks. Have a great weekend. Stay safe.

Time flies…

On August 30, 1996, John and I met for the first time after he answered my ad. And the rest is twenty-four years of a whole lot of history.

Unfortunately, we don’t really get to celebrate in the traditional sense this year. We normally do two things at this time of year — go out for a special dinner, and go to the Labor Day weekend party in Vegas. In the clusterfuck that is 2020, we can do neither.

To add insult to injury, or vice versa, on Friday, John had an abscessed tooth extracted. It had gotten to be an emergency because of problems getting in to see a dentist/specialist due to Covid. I was terrified that the infection would spread, but it seems it didn’t. Still, having a tooth pulled is no fun. I couldn’t even bake him anniversary brownies, since he couldn’t eat them.

We did order take-out brunch yesterday. Then I discovered my order was screwed up when we got home.

Happy anniversary!! massive eye roll

And of course, all weekend we were bombarded with bad news about Portland, Kenosha, Hurricane Laura, and so forth. I confiscated the remote and told John CNN was off the table. (I believe my actual words were, “We are not watching this shit.”) I was worried about two dear friends, both in unpleasant circumstances, and could do nothing for either one.

Powerlessness. Acceptance. Keep on carrying on.

So, feeling nostalgic, and because I’ve been going through and deleting old files (which I really should have done before I got the new computer, but oh well), I came across some fun pictures John and I took early in our relationship. I think this was before Erica Scott came to be.

One day, John brought home a very cool new toy from his work so that we could play with it over the weekend. It was the latest in high tech.

A digital camera.

For those of you who don’t remember the joys of having film developed at Fotomat and having to wait to discover 3/4 of your pictures turned out crappy, blurry, or had a thumb stuck in them, you can’t possibly imagine the thrill of the digital camera. Pre-Smart phones, they were the latest and greatest. But the early ones were laughably clunky, even though they were cutting edge at the time. This contraption John brought home was rather large, and — get this — you actually inserted a diskette. You shot your pictures, then then took out the diskette, popped it into your computer drive, and uploaded your pictures.

So on a beautiful sunny Saturday, John and I went to a hiking area off Mulholland Drive, and spent a couple of hours walking and taking various pictures.

This is a rare sighting of me outdoors, folks.

We found a little hidden alcove and no one else was around, so of course this happened:

Look at my handsome man. ♥

But then, of course, I could only take so much sunlight, and we came home. And then experimented with a different kind of picture.

You know, the sort of pictures of me that are all over the net now… but certainly weren’t then. I think this might be the first time I’d been shot naked since I was a baby. (Please disregard John’s hideous old couch. He and I both have what he likes to call “dead grandma furniture.”)

I had a lot to learn about posing then. But I did have the leg and pointed toe thing going on. 😀

So many experiences in twenty-four years. So many milestones and memories.

People are wishing us well, and some have said, “May you have another twenty-four years.” But honestly? I don’t want another twenty-four years if they’re going to be like 2020. This needs to end. So many friends I know and love have had their worst year ever. I’m trying to hold on to a positive thought, but the damned abyss of depression waits at my feet. So I keep on working, keep on plugging each day, and hope for the best.

Today would have been my brother’s birthday. Of course, that gets all the feels going too. Ugh. But I have to look forward, not back.

Remembering something Jay sent me a while back — I am brave. We all are brave. We are survivors.

And hey! A week from Tuesday, I get to have my hair cut and colored. Hair salons are back open as of today. Then I can video chat with pretty hair. Because yes, I’m that vain.

Take care, everyone. Be kind.

We’re the same, and yet we’re different, part 952

Warning: Controversy and opinions ahead.

Since there are so many photo sites out there in the spankosphere, one is exposed to an infinite amount of spanking pictures on any given day. I happen to belong to a private spanking group on Facebook, of all places, and the group leader makes a point of posting all different types of pictures, for the widest variety of appeal. Recently, within a week of each other, two photos were posted, and they elicited fully opposite reactions from me, quite extreme ones. One, I loved. I couldn’t stop looking at it. I reposted it on FetLife and asked where it was from. I looked at it again. And again. I squirmed in my chair and couldn’t concentrate on my work. Yes, it was that intense. The second one, I hated. Passionately. Everything about it. It made me angry.

So I got to thinking about how different we all are, and how these pictures touch things in some of us and trigger things in others. And how one person can love a photo and the next person will loathe it.

I’m going to post both pictures and explain why I feel the way I do about them.
This is not, repeat, not a post claiming that my likes are better than your likes, that so-and-so’s scenes are wrong and my preferences are the correct ones, etc. Because I invite anyone who wishes to comment to tell me honestly about how you feel. I’m curious what makes people tick. It’s part of my never-ending fascination with This Thing We Do.

So, without further blathering on my part, here’s the first shot, the one I loved.

Yes, it’s clearly posed. Someone on FetLife thought it was from a commercial (and vanilla) photo shoot for lingerie or something like that. Yeah… if the person who conceived of this photo setup is vanilla, I’m a virgin.

What do I love? Everything. The lighting. The attractiveness of both participants. The blissful smile on the woman’s face, the sweet curve of her bottom, the sweep of her hair. His open shirt, his hand on her butt cheek, and the sexy, hungry way he’s gazing down at her. To me, this photo is art. This is something I would actually want framed and hanging on my wall. It’s gorgeous. And it’s so damned sexy, it gives me goosebumps. And other bodily reactions.

Next, the second shot.

Obviously, this is from RGE Films. I hadn’t heard of them, so I looked them up. They specialize in extreme pain and humiliation. OK, fine, to each their own. But that notwithstanding, this picture really pisses me off.

First: how much torture is one body supposed to withstand? Is it really necessary to have extreme caning, figging, soaping, AND kneeling naked on a hard floor all at once? One, maybe two, but not all four. Overkill.

Second, and one of my big pet peeves in the scene: Terrible technique. On both women, the right ass cheek is torn all to hell, way more than the left. Why do tops do this? I get it, I know it happens by accident sometimes in a session. But come on. They can see everything that’s happening to the bottom’s body. They can see that way more damage is being incurred on one side. If they can’t see it, then they shouldn’t be spanking without glasses. If they can see it and don’t care… well. I will censor my thoughts there. Besides being excruciating, I find the asymmetry to be aesthetically displeasing. But that could just be my OCD talking.

And finally, I freaking loathe this creep hovering over them, with his scruffy bald head in the viewers’ faces. He’s probably sneering at them. He just seems… mean. I don’t mind strict tops. I don’t mind tough tops. But I don’t like mean ones.

So, here’s where it gets interesting. Because I know very well that someone else will look at this pair of pictures and see the opposite. They’ll think the first picture is sissified, romanticized, fake, too pretty. Spanking Lite. Kink viewed through rose-colored glasses. And that the second photo is raw, real, and powerful. That it appeals to the dark side, to those who crave real punishment, real pain.

I like darkness too. I just think this photo is a poor example of it.

What do you think, readers? How do these two pictures make you feel? I am genuinely interested in varied viewpoints, because, like I said at the beginning, I find this utterly fascinating.