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I haven’t written in over two weeks. Main reason? I don’t feel like I’ve had anything new or interesting to say. This sucks. But you know, life. All work and no play. Responsibilities. Deadlines. Stuff.

Over the past couple of weeks, I’ve had lots of subjects come up in my mind, things for random discussion, but then I’d get back to work and forget about them. And honestly, I shouldn’t be writing this now, but I felt the need for a break. So instead of elaborating on any of them, I’m just going to toss out some random thoughts here, and if any of you would like to pick up on one or more of them, please feel free.

1. Good tops are worth their weight in gold. The more stories I hear about the crappy ones (and the more I recall my own experiences with a few of them over the years), the more I appreciate the kind, considerate and thoughtful tops who know they hold our vulnerability in their hands and treat it well. ♥
2. I don’t regret my bad scene experiences. Luckily, I was not badly damaged by any of them, and I learned from them.
3. Always keep your instincts well honed. If things seem off, or too good to be true, then oftentimes that’s your gut trying to tell you something. People are not always what they seem to be.
4. (Here comes Granny Buzzkill) A moving car is not a toy. It’s a potentially lethal weapon. Horsing around in them, texting, speeding, isn’t funny; it’s utterly irresponsible. And to keep this on topic, no, it’s not a spanking offense. It warrants license suspension. Yeah, I know, I’m being a hard-ass. I will say this once and then never again — if you ever lose a loved one to a car accident, you will know where I’m coming from. Please. Just don’t.
5. Question: Why does a top who ended things with me keep checking out my profile on a kink site? I mean, what’s up with that? If he didn’t want anything more to do with me, why does he keep looking at me? (sigh) And yes, I’d welcome him back in a heartbeat were he to change his mind.
6. I am nervous AF about going back to a national party next month. Excited too, looking forward to seeing/meeting some people, but after a year off, it’s going to feel weird. I’m really not sure where my place is in these things, nowadays.
7. And finally, last but most definitely not least: My friend Jay has returned to blogging. Like me, she took a long break (hers was four years to my one). Like me, she’s trying to find her way back, find her people, dipping her toes back in and trying to get past some hard times. Please welcome her back, link her blog to your roll if it isn’t there already, and give her a read. I hope she will stick around.

Back to work with me. 🙂

And so it goes

Hello, everyone. Sorry for the absence.

After much thought, going back and forth, changing my mind and then back again, I have decided it’s time to bring this blog to an end.

I have been in the spanking scene for twenty-one years this month, and online for nineteen. I have watched many changes in what became known as social media. In the early days for spanking chat and exploration, there were what was known as newsgroups, and various chat rooms. Often the latter devolved into a bunch of silly cyber spanking, but one could find intelligent conversation if one looked carefully. Then, around 2000, give or take a year, those gave way to chat forums, such as those on MSN and Yahoo, the old Shadow Lane chat board, etc. People posted and chatted and shared and connected. I co-managed a successful forum for a few years and had a blast.

When the forums began to run their course, they were overtaken by a new phenomenon: the spanking blog. Soon, everyone and their second cousin twice removed was blogging. I joined this bandwagon in 2005, on what used to be the hopping place (!): MySpace. My blog there straggled along for a while, trying to find its audience, but there was so much competition. But then two things happened. One, I was listed by our blog queen, Bonnie, who made a point of spotlighting new blogs in her “In With the New” column. Things really picked up for me after that, but I still had a second holy grail to achieve. The buzz in the blogosphere was about a gentleman who went by the name of Chross, who had a weekly list of what he considered the most notable blog posts. If one was lucky enough to be “Chrossed,” they would be treated to a highly gratifying spike in blog hits. But how did one get on Chross’s radar, I wondered? I finally grew so frustrated that I wrote a post called “Who Do I Have to @#$% to Get on Chross’s List?” Apparently, that got his attention. 🙂

After that, wow. Views, comments, etc. skyrocketed. Until MySpace died, and I took the plunge and started a new blog on Blogger in 2010. I flourished there for years, getting Chrossed often, sharing adventures and party stories and photos and scenes and video shoots, as well as bits and pieces of my personal life. When Blogger threatened to censor or shut down all their “adult” blogs, I migrated to WordPress. Turns out it wasn’t necessary, since Blogger backed off, but I don’t regret it.

However, things changed yet again. Slowly but surely, the spanking blog was overtaken by the Tumblr blogs: pictures. Lots and lots and lots of pictures. The lengthy blog entry morphed into quickie sound bites, gifs and jpegs. Comments became likes and reposts. The spanking models, who all used to blog, now opened Tumblr accounts. Twitter came to be, and now, instead of writing party and shoot reports, people tweeted the action as it was happening. There were some exceptions who maintained their popularity (Hermione and Ronnie come to mind, as well as some of the DD/Hoh blogs and some author blogs) but it seemed that overall, the traditional written spanking blog had gone the way of the VCR and the variety show.

Even so, I figured as long as I had stories to tell, experiences to share, connections to make, I’d have an audience. For quite a while, my views remained high thanks to being Chrossed often. But now, it seems even our beloved Chross has given up the ghost. And the annual Spanking Blogg Awards, put together by John Osborne of Triple A, finally eliminated the Best Creative Blogger category last year because it wasn’t getting any nominations. I was lucky enough to win second place in 2015, that award’s final year.

After many years and thousand of words, kids, I’m fresh out of things to say. On topic, anyway. I don’t want to hash and rehash the same discussions; there’s FetLife for that. Scene-wise, things have changed for me. I no longer have a top, and I haven’t played since 50 Freaks in February. I go to two parties a year. I do not shoot anymore, and even if someone were to offer it up, I’m not sure I would do it. I don’t enjoy looking at myself on film anymore — those HD cameras are not kind! And as for my personal life, I have been dealing with a great deal of grief and challenges over the past few months, including an ongoing situation with John that is stressful and scary. But you know, I don’t want to go into that on here anymore either. I have ranted, raved, wept, opened up and laid myself bare (physically and emotionally) in these posts over the years. I think it’s time for that to end. Everyone has problems; they don’t want to hear mine. And if I can’t post on-topic fun stuff, there’s really no point in continuing.

Also, I made the mistake, in a time of weakness, of writing political posts on here. Please. Can we all agree that there’s enough of that shit out there everywhere you look? I mean, really — using a spanking blog, of all things, to push one’s political agenda is arrogant, self-serving and a big waste of time, don’t you think? So I do apologize for that bit of foolishness.

I am not taking this blog down. I want to preserve it, because I’m proud of it. I would like people to be able to refer back to it, reread posts they liked, enjoy the pictures, etc. My life, my heart and my soul are in these pages. So it will remain intact, even though I won’t be adding to it any longer. I will always be grateful for my readers, all the comments, all the feedback. Without you guys, we writers might as well be talking to ourselves. And hey, I even appreciate those hapless dumbasses who gave me so much wonderful CHoS fodder. One more for the road? Sure, why not…

Hi I would like to spanking you hardly but it is turning me on and in the end which will be not short time I would like to have sex or atleast blowjob becouse I don’t want go away horny and I don’t want jerkoffing if you are okay with that or you have some other way to make e come and relax after when I spanking you hard and long tell me

(sigh) Some things never change, I guess. I suggest you come the way you always do — in your mama’s basement in front of your sticky keyboard. And for the last time, fuck off.

I don’t get as much of this nonsense nowadays, but I still see it. Recently, Alex got a critique on her Tumblr that she is neglecting to post pictures of her anus. She’s nicer than I am: I would have replied that if this person wants to see an asshole, they should look in a mirror.

Some of you have my antiquated (but still functional) AOL address. My gmail address is at the end of the About Me section here. I’m still out there, on Facebook, Twitter and FetLife. I have always welcomed polite and civil correspondence (and no, you do not have to agree with me, just don’t be a dick about it), and that will not change.

So what should be my last gasp? Perhaps I’ll just say screw it and reveal all… my real name, my family, the TV shows they worked on…

…

…

…

wait for it…

…

…

…

ready?

…

…

…

Come on, you didn’t really think I’d tell all that, did ya? Besides, I wanted to go out on a Big Bang. 😛

And so this hard-edged, tender-hearted, snarky spanko bids you farewell, in this venue at least. Have a great life, y’all. ♥ ♥ ♥  Thank you for reading.

Post #1000!

As many of my long-time readers know, I started blogging on MySpace many years ago, and when they tanked, I switched over to Blogger in 2010. Since then, my combined posts on Blogger and then WordPress have reached a whopping one thousand. Can’t believe I had that much to say, and I’m still going at it.

What to write for #1000… I had some good suggestions, and thanks to everyone for those. I finally decided to do a tribute post to all the men I’ve worked with in video over the years. It will be a fun retrospective for me, and hopefully for you too.

So that there is no appearance of favoritism, I will post them alphabetically.

Danny Chrighton

It’s fitting that he is first, because not only did we shoot “When Danny Met Erica,” together, but we were play partners and the best of friend for three years, before he moved out of state. We’re still in touch periodically and I hope to see him at a party one of these days. He is dear to me, and I’m so glad I have our video as a souvenir of our time together.

“Coach” Daniels

“Coach” and his partner, Ms. Burns, AKA Veronica Daniels, worked for Real Spankings Institute, then branched off as The Spanking Couple. About ten years ago, they did a filmed interview with me, and Coach and I did a spanking/caning scene. He dubbed me “Great Scott,” which tickled me. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter they were both outed in the scene and all their material was taken down. But I still have the clip and pictures, and a fond memory.

Michael Donovan, AKA The Villain, AKA the Court Disciplinarian

When Spanking Court was filming (sadly, they are no longer), I was lucky enough to do a six-clip story arc with them. Michael and I were friends and occasional play partners then, so it was a joy to be able to work with him. We did a little video on our own as well, “The Villain Strikes Erica Scott,” which I now have in my Spanking Library clips. I had so much fun with him, and with everyone involved in SC.

Steve Fuller

Now retired, Steve was quite the shining star in the video world, working for several companies, and I had the extreme pleasure of being his very first co-star, in Shadow Lane‘s “The Spanking Professor.” I also worked with him for Spanking Epics, doing a couple of their “spanklets” and being part of an ensemble with him in the Being Keith Jones Trilogy. I really liked Steve and miss seeing him in videoland!

Keith Jones

What can I say about Keith — he was my very first co-star, back in 2000 for Shadow Lane, and we went on to do five full-length videos plus a spanklet for Spanking Epics together. Working with him was amazing and we had a lot of fun times, both shooting and playing at parties. He was the one who gave me the nickname “Bionic Bottom.” (It’s not so much anymore, but it was for years!) 🙂 Here I am gleefully pointing out where I’d nicked him after beaning him with a prop bottle. (Actually, I felt awful about that, but he was a good sport!)

Paul Kennedy

I love this man; he’s a good friend to John and me, and he’s the partner of my dear friend Alex Reynolds. I met him in 2009 at a Shadow Lane party, and have wanted to work with him for years. Finally got my chance when Pandora Blake came to L.A. and shot us in “The Workaholic” for Dreams of Spanking. It was a fun shoot, full of energy and snappy dialogue, and great spanking (hand, hairbrush, belt).

Ralph Marvell

Of all my co-stars, I’ve known Ralph the longest; we met in 1999, became friends, and shot “Spank Thy Neighbor” for Shadow Lane in 2001. We got a little frisky at the end of that video, and the first time I watched it was quite the experience, sitting between Ralph and John and blushing from head to toe. We’re still buddies to this day.

(Jesus, those granny panties… not of my choosing!)

Stephen Lewis

I shot two films for Northern Spanking with Stephen, and he was a blast. He was a wonderful sport, even when I was throwing his slipper at him or dumping M&M’s over his head, and he and I had crackling chemistry and repartee on screen. He had the ability to meet all my smart-assery with his own jabs, which made it all the more fun.

Devlin O’Neill

Devlin and I did one shoot together, Shadow Lane‘s “Stand Corrected,” and it was quite the memorable experience. We wrote the script, and we did a road trip together from L.A. to Vegas. Both of us had terrible colds, but we soldiered on, sucking down Sudafed and throat lozenges, and made it through a vigorous shoot. Devlin was a sweetie, and we had a lot of laughs during our long drive to and from Vegas. He even let me eat ice cream in his car, which he teasingly told me not to mention, because his littles at the time were not allowed to do so! (That was eleven years ago, so I think it’s OK to mention it now!)

John Osborne

The busy top of Triple AAA Spanking (and partner of Sarah Gregory), John and I have shot several videos, both for his site and for Sarah’s. John is a lot of fun to work with; he’s sweet and funny and I enjoy playing with him off camera too!

Paul Rogers

In 2010, I flew to Connecticut to shoot with Sarah Gregory and Paul, for both her site and his clip site Spanking 101. I was with them four days, shot a lot of content and had a marvelous time. Paul and Sarah treated me like a queen and we ended up with some great stuff. Paul is one hell of a spanker, too — I trashed his hand, but he trashed me pretty good too! (In the best possible way, of course.)

Uncle Bob

I shot a few clips for Uncle Bob’s Woodshed clip site a few years ago, including a fun one called “Sweet Revenge” in which I blistered Bob’s hand. 😀  Ah, I love it when that happens. I’ve known Bob for many years and it’s always fun to see him at parties.

Richard Windsor

Rich and I did a little bit of filming together: we shot a vignette for Pixie’s “Cause For Paws,” a quickie clip advertising my book back in 2011, and a two-part interview for Spanking Tube. Even though the experiences were brief, they were great fun.

Robert Wolf

Last but definitely not least, Robert (Lily Starr’s hubby) and I have shot several clips together for Lily Starr Spanking, including “The Devil Wears a Red Bottom,” “The Online Menace” (in which I blistered his hand as well), and one of my favorites, “The Secret Life of the Kinky Wife.” He’s a sweetie (as is his lovely wife!).

I do need to mention Amateur Spankings — I shot for them, but the spanker likes to stay off camera and I don’t know what name he uses publicly, so it’s best that I leave it at that. But it was fun and he’s a nice guy. 🙂

Honorable mention: There is one man I’ve always wished I could have shot with, and that’s Eric Strickman, AKA Uncle Eric. He and I have never met, but we used to IM a great deal and we even talked on the phone a couple of times (those of you who know me, know what a rarity that is). Why did I want to shoot with him? Just look at him!

I’ve been so very lucky, working with such talented men. They gave me more memorable experiences than I can count and brought me much delicious pain and even more delicious pleasure. Thank you all. ♥

That’s it for #1000. I don’t know if I have another thousand in me, kids, but as long as you want to keep reading, I’ll keep writing.

Have a great weekend, y’all.

Important: please do take a moment and read this

No, not my blog. Today, I am focusing on someone else’s writing. A blog post, to be specific, that highlights yet another piece of writing. Roundabout? Yup. But bear with me.

The piece I’d like you to read is by author Ava Sinclair, entitled Twisting a fetish into abuse: One blogger’s dangerous message that hurts us all. (NOTE: I have tried and tried to link directly to this post, and it’s not working. So go to her blog page, and click on the article at the top.) The writer she’s calling attention to is Matt Forney, someone you probably never heard of (I know I hadn’t, before today). This man exemplifies Every. Wrong. Notion about TTWD. When you link to her blog, do click on the link to his post entitled, “How to Beat Your Wife or Girlfriend and Get Away With It.” I guaran-damn-tee you, your blood will boil. At least I hope it does. Because if you agree with him… I don’t think you and I have much to say to one another.

Ava Sinclair writes spanking erotica (I have had the pleasure of copy-editing several of her books). She writes about women getting spanked. I read about women getting spanked, and I am a woman who gets spanked. Because I choose to. Because I love it, even though I like to pretend I don’t. It’s fully consensual, even though I admit to liking the fantasy of non-consent. No man puts me in my place, and no man spanks me because he wants to “inflict the maximum amount of pain” with “minimal risk” to himself. Any man who has that attitude really doesn’t want to be in the same room with me, because I will verbally rip off his nuts and shove them up his ass. The man I play with are respectful, kind, and are interested in our mutual pleasure. They are not misogynistic, hateful chauvinist pigs whose big fat egos mask their tiny little members.

I will speak out against people like Matt Forney until I no longer have breath in my body. Why? Because I need to. Because people need to be told that what we do isn’t about beating women because they deserve it, no matter what jerk-offs like this say.

By the way — yes, I know that Slate called Forney out as being one of Trump’s followers at the RNC. That is not, repeat, not why I’m writing this. I couldn’t give a rat’s ass what this moron’s political leanings are. What I do care about is that he’s spreading a poisonous, sexist message about something I and many others love, making a sick joke of it, and I won’t stand for it.

So please, go read Ava’s blog that I linked above. Comment on it. Share it with others. Don’t let the Matt Forneys of the world taint our pleasurable, consensual fetish.

Oh… and Slate made a point of showing a picture of Matt Forney and saying that he is not married. No shit, Sherlock!

(deep breath)

Have a great weekend, y’all.

So, what brought this on…

Today, I noticed that my blog views spiked dramatically upward. No complaints, mind you. I haven’t posted since Monday and my views were pretty much dormant. But what could be causing the traffic? I did a scan of the blogosphere — nope, nothing posted that has anything to do with me.

Then I realized… it’s probably from something completely vanilla. Ooopsies! 😀

As I’ve mentioned ad nauseam, I use Erica Scott pretty much everywhere, including Twitter. Several years ago, I connected with and friended “Cousin Barnabas,” who is a fellow Dark Shadows fanatic and has a blog called The Collinsport Historical Society. He knows about my blog, and it didn’t send him running away screaming. In fact, he’s one of my blog followers, and he often “Likes” my tweets. I ♥ open-minded people.

Because Dark Shadows is currently celebrating its 50th anniversary (!!!), he invited several people to write a guest column on his blog about their experiences with the program, when/why/how they watched it, etc. I was very honored to be on this list, and I wrote a little piece about my years as a DS fangirl (and in particular, a Quentin Collins/David Selby fangirl). He posted it this morning, and you can read it here. And he tweeted about it, which linked people to my own Twitter profile.

And what’s on my Twitter profile? My blog URL.

Oh, dear. Imagine the shock when a bunch of Dark Shadows fans read this column, wondered who I was, and clicked on my blog. Not quite what they were expecting!

Ah well. They’re all big boys and girls, I’m assuming. For the DS fans landing here via the Collinsport Historical Society, I offer you this toon that my talented friend Dave Wolfe created for me a few years ago, which combines two of my favorite obsessions. 😀

Oh… and this really should go without saying, but I’m saying it anyway. If you visit the CHS blog and want to comment on my post, please don’t say anything about TTWD. That’s not what his page is about and that would just be rude, ya know?

Defining… and redefining

OK, kids. I have some things to say. Hunker down and grab a beverage, because this is long.

I find myself at a crossroad with this blog lately. Since I moved to WordPress, my views and comments have dropped by about two-thirds. I was told to wait it out, and I have; it’s been five months. I’m not sure who my readers are anymore, really. Do people still read blogs, these days? Is the blogosphere destined to be pictures only? And where do I fit in, in all this, at this stage of my life?

So, I’ve been feeling the need to clarify a few things. Much of this, many of you might think is already well known. Bear with me, because I’m clarifying as much to myself as I am to you, and I need to get it all down.

1. I am a depressive. I have been for most of my life. It is clinical and physiological; my brain wiring, serotonin levels, etc. are screwy. I am also cynical, curmudgeonly, snarky, sarcastic, and a glass-half-empty sort. This is who I am. How do I cope? I take meds. I exercise. I talk to friends, I play with my top. And sometimes, I vent. I rant. I bitch. Sometimes, I wallow a little in the pity pot until I’m able to climb out of it.

I realize I’m not everyone’s cup of tea; I am no ray of sunshine. But if you don’t like who I am, or what I have to say, think I’m too negative, please… just don’t read me. And please, don’t shame me or invalidate me. I know people mean well when they try to fix, try to suggest things that will snap me out of it, suggest that I count my blessings and be grateful, tell me that other people have it much worse. Believe me, I am fully cognizant of my blessings, and I know they are many. Problem is, when I am in the abyss, I can recognize the blessings with my head… but I cannot feel them in my gut. They are temporarily lost to me. Regardless of what Abe Lincoln said, I cannot simply “make up my mind to be happy.”

Let me put it another way. If you saw someone in a diabetic coma, would you say to them, “Come on! Just make up your mind that your blood sugar levels are normal.” I would hope not. A depressive cannot control the unhappiness anymore than a diabetic can control their blood sugar. They can only manage it somewhat, and hope that it doesn’t go haywire.

So. if my sometimes cranky outlook on life isn’t your cup of tea, please feel free to seek out people who will blow sunshine and rainbows up your ass. I promise I will try hard not to be too over the top negative; I will keep working on perspective.

And remember this: 🙂

2. I am a spanko. Well, duh, Erica. Tell us something we don’t know. Patience, boys and girls.

I’ve been in this scene now for 19 years and counting, and I’ve watched a lot of changes, seen a lot of people come and go. Maybe I spend too much time on FetLife, but in recent years, I’ve noticed an overall attitude, a sort of negative vibe toward people who identify with just one fetish.

Used to be that people like me, who identified spanking as their sole fetish, called themselves “spanking purists.” However, now that term is frowned upon; it’s considered elitist. Somehow, it’s not OK to simply enjoy one aspect of the lifestyle anymore. We are supposed to experiment, to try new things, to be open-minded. We are supposed to “evolve.” So now we have St. Andrew’s crosses and whips at spanking parties. We have caned breasts and thighs. We have interrogation scenes (granted, those are done privately, but still).

I have very mixed feelings about the term evolve, as it’s used in the scene. On the one hand, some of my dearest friends use it and I know they don’t mean to upset anyone. But on the other hand, I resent the hell out of it. Because the implication is, if you’re not evolving, if you’re not continually changing and broadening, then you’re a dinosaur. You’re narrow-minded. You’re doing it wrong.

Here’s the deal, kids. I’ve done my experimenting. In my earlier scene years, I went to way more BDSM gatherings than spanking parties. I’ve been tied up, tied down, on a St. Andrew’s cross, in suspension. I was whipped by this guy. I scened with a man who is considered one of the premier experts on BDSM. (Who, incidentally, marked the hell out of me on a Friday night of a spanking party weekend; a major no-no.) I worked in a dungeon.

Most of my friends like a lot more fetish stuff than I do. Hell, my boyfriend and my top like a lot more fetish stuff than I do. And so sometimes, I doubt myself. I wonder if I need to branch out, be more open to other things.

Recently, John and I went to a BDSM/dungeon party, for the first time in many years. There was nothing wrong with it, no one did or said anything inappropriate. But I was miserable. I didn’t enjoy being there, I didn’t like anything I was seeing. And when we left, I was sad and depressed, and I wasn’t sure why. Until I thought about it, and realized that, just like when I was younger and desperate to belong, I was trying to force myself into places where I didn’t fit.

Well, no more. I’m not going to apologize for being a spanko, for liking what I like. What gets me going? I love a man’s hand, or implement, striking my bottom/sit spots/uppermost upper thighs. A friend recently asked me, “Do you hate D/s?” No, absolutely not; it can be really hot with the right person. But for me, it must be centered around spanking. Period. I do not want a gag in my mouth, a collar around my neck, clamps on my nipples or a hook up my ass. Paddles, straps, crops, canes? Bring it. A nice soft flogger on my back — there’s my exception to the bottom rule. I don’t want to be thudded with implements that look like closet poles, or have my flesh flayed off with a rubber hose. Marks, bruises? Sure. But my blood is to remain within my unbroken skin, thank you. My “bionic bottom” days are over. I am not in a competition with anyone to see who can have the most trashed ass.

If that makes me unevolved, then so be it. But I will not feel less-than about it anymore. I am who I am, and this is what works for me. If you like a lot of different fetish activities, then I am happy for you and wish you all the pleasure. But please don’t judge me or think less of me because I don’t.

3. This blog is more writing-centric than photo-centric. I realize that everyone and their second cousin has a Tumblr photo blog these days. But let’s be real, folks. I think it’s time to start calling myself a retired spanking model. My shoots are very few and very far in between these days. Don’t get me wrong; I am extremely proud of the fact that I have been a spanking bottom on video all through my 40s and most of my 50s. That’s unheard of. But even I realize I’m getting a little too old for this. I may have knocked a few years off my face with surgery, but the rest of my body is aging, in various and insidious little ways, despite all my efforts with diet and exercise.

Recently I watched a video that I shot last year, and had a couple of rude awakenings, seeing myself in HD. Fact: most bottoms can look good when the spankee is bent over — everything smooths out and tightens. The true test of a bottom’s shape and tone is when they’re upright. As I watched myself over the man’s lap, the camera zoomed wayyyyyy in on my bottom (jeezus, if that thing were any closer, I could have had a colonoscopy). And then, in that extreme closeup, the top told me to stand up, and I did. And watched as, in glorious HD, my bottom sort of flattened out and collapsed. ACK!! My eyes! Also, as I watched myself lying across the bed, much to my shock and horror, I saw my mother’s age-spotted arms and vein-y hands. How the hell did she get in there? Then… oh, f**k. That’s not Mom. That’s me. (Yes, Mom, I can still hear you. I should have worn more sunscreen.)

QUICK EDIT: Please don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying I’ll never shoot again; I enjoy it too much, and if the opportunity arises, I won’t say no. But what I don’t want is to cross over the line between being a rebel against ageism and being a joke. I know haters are gonna hate, but I’m not made of stone. Comments like “What is someone as long in the tooth as Erica Scott still doing in spanking videos?” hurt. Yes, that’s real. Or the guy on Twitter who posted my picture and tweeted, “Wow, I didn’t know there was such a thing as granny porn.”

What does this all mean? Mostly that the days of exciting write-ups of shoots, with accompanying photos, are pretty much behind me. And because I don’t go to many parties and we don’t have a local spanking scene, my party reports and pictorials will be rare as well. So, if you look at blogs for the spanking photos, this blog isn’t for you. Sure, I’ll still have posts about Steve and our scenes. But I’m sure a lot of people find those redundant after a while.

So what does a spanko and former video actress write about? I feel like I have a lot of wisdom and experience to share, and would love to have some interesting discourse with y’all. But if all folks want is pictures these days, then I may need to gracefully retire this blog. Thoughts?

One more point, and then I’ll end this soliloquy. If you do read this blog, and you enjoy it, or if you want to debate a point with me, ask questions, whatever… for heaven’s sake, take a minute and drop a comment. Without feedback, we bloggers might as well be talking to ourselves. And I don’t want to hear any more about how it’s too difficult to comment on WordPress. I’ve already explained how it works, here. Also, people have mentioned that they don’t want to comment because they don’t want their names and email to show up. Well, you don’t have to post them. When you go to the comments section, the first thing that comes up is blank spaces for Name, Email, and Website. Guess what? You can leave them blank. Put whatever name/nickname that you wish in the name slot, and that’s it. Actually, you don’t even have to do that; if you leave Name blank, your comment will appear as Anonymous. So, no more excuses. I don’t ask you to agree with me when you comment. All I’ve ever ask is 1. you stay on topic, and 2. you are civil and polite.

(whew) OK. I feel better now. I meant no offense to anyone; just needed to redefine who I am and what I’m doing here.

Have a great weekend, y’all.